Catholic schools had weird things for maintaining a semblance of order. They were called "nuns with rulers" and they could bring a varsity fullback to his knees.

"I don't know. They were jammies. They had Yodas 'n shit on 'em."

I have a wealth of opinions about this!!! No offense intended, but the dog is a definite concern of mine but you sound like you're on top of that. Is the Seattle option a viable one? If it is, and if you want to do this right (which means getting the fuck AWAY from him with no residual effects, like him trying to…

Ok, well I am a bit lazy. So there's that.

Anyone who has the good sense to adopt a user name like yours deserves straightforwardness in the man you're dealing with. Rocket J. Squirrel demands answers!

As I recall, she's drunk on her butt and tries but it doesn't turn out very well.

Oh! Raeann Graff trying to sing with the Frozen Embryos! I'll be at my locker, Jordan, waiting...

I'm going to sound like the Worst Old in the World, but I don't get why people don't just ASK anymore. That used to be the only way I ever found out stuff. I wonder if "people" are often afraid of the answers...

I respectfully disagree. I think "parental instinct" was fully engaged here. You see what's going on, you know your kid, you know what the kid's thinking and what the kid's capabilities are, you think "What's the plausible worst thing that can happen?" and you also think, "What will the outcome be if I drop the…

When at least one NFL owner is a well-known wife-beater and nothing is done about it, I don't see ANYthing changing any time soon regarding the league and its attitude toward women.

I think you're giving them both far too much credit but do see your point.

All I can see right now is Cartman and the boys in his basement...

"Useless is as Useless does?"

No, no...can't possibly be just you because it's me, too. That's the worst movie I've seen in recent memory and, since I'm An Old, it could be the worst I've ever seen but I've just forgotten others. Case-in-point: There was another terrible one with somebody (Bruce Willis?) walking around in the middle of a crashed…

Don't forget to condition that thing. Loads of Avalon Organics Peppermint conditioner, so its end won't split. :-)

One word, Shrayber: Rosebud. You'll always be the first guess when something begins with, "Um, guess WHO..." It's your lot in life, your cross to bear, your albatross, what you get for that whole rosebud-thing. You're a great guy with a great personality. Never change and here's to a great summer! (And I mean…

Goodholygod, that was funny!

Probably the only instance in which the "Do you know who I am?" defense would certainly work.

During a taping of "Live from The Actors' Studio," Jim Carrey was asked, "If there is a God and you arrive at the pearly gates, what would you like to hear Him say?" And Carrey replied, " ' Don't worry. She's not here.' "

I haven't read all (hardly any) comments but will bet that, if blame is to be accorded, it will be along the lines of, "She doesn't turn him on because she's ugly/fat/uglyfat/not pretty/not attractive/too fat/too skinny..." In other words, how can it possibly be his "fault" that this woman doesn't turn him on? She…