Shockingly, Amber Heard, of all people, BROUGHT IT. So did Blake Lively. I used to think of those two as the human equivalents of watching paint dry, but not after tonight! Katy Perry needs to be STOPPED, the Olsen twins looked like boujee Orthodox nuns and I am here for it, Madonna looked halfway decent and on…

You must be a hit at parties.

For all of her Master White Race posturing, she could fit in at any wedding hosted by my family, and blend in. I don’t think her WN homies would appreciate the fact that their girl looks like my Arab aunties. Little less 14 Words, little more 14 Steps to Make The Best Loubieh in Bourj Hammoud.

“I don’t see colour. I don’t care if you’re black, white, brown, purple, sparkle. I just see people!”

Yeah, and then in a navel-gazing, moist-with-White-Tears Saturday Night Social post, some Becky will wax poetic about “all these hostile WOC controlling the narrative” and “hurting her feelings” when all she is trying to do is “have a dialogue,” and “they were being mean” because they “wouldn’t tell her what books to…

“Oh crap here we are, having stolen their land, the two Native kids in the whole school presenting, in sea of mostly Italian, Yugoslavian, some Asians, but mostly otherwise white heads in the auditorium.”

“I highly doubt that your everyday Joe/Jane around in Canada, when they see a Native they immediately adopt an attitude of superiority and so on...we’re not suddenly Christopher Columbus’ all over again, are we?”

“Who of the 11 morons that liked your thought vomit thinks controlling a toddler when a dog comes up to toddler is how it works.”

Reading comprehension isn’t your forte, is it?

“My family has to be very protective of him all times”

Homegirl is out marching against Sharia and her dress straight trying to march the fuck away from her Cracker Barrel body.