“What’s beating Floyd Mayweather like?”

Today I learned there’s an Alaska Baseball League. #TheMoreJuneau

There’s no way Lord Alfred Hayes could have remembered all that.

“Don’t rhyme quinoa with any wrestler’s name. Past or present, but specifically past.”

Vince McMahon’s Rules for XFL Announcers:
-Do not use pronouns.

Now-Frantic Sports Editor: “Takin’ It In The Enes: Phil Fails Again.”

Looks like Ben Cherington wandered into the wrong office again.

Oh, it feels good to laugh at Stuart Scott again.

“Whose Disgusting Baseball Hand Is This?"

I’m impressed. The last time I caught something in Cleveland it required three rounds of antibiotics.

Guarantee that Rousey double shank legs Coerria right off of a rear choke helix. If Coerria lasts through all of that, I’d be surprised if Rousey doesn’t immediately force a Janckman’s Plexus on her and shatter her buttonhook. Coerria’s only shot is a quick, accurate Miranda’s Reversal into a hog-nosed bat tap. Once…

Fucking Pepperidge Farm is looking at the box score this morning and going, “Damn, that’s too many fuggin’ turnovers.”

Natrone Means

Its really nice how Bartolo pays tribute to John Kruk’s All-Star at bat against Randy Johnson so often.

Buck Showalter is old school.

Like sexual intercourse between two humans, Baseball is a game of rhythm and inches. Your greatest adversaries are your own mind and body. Both may include spitting.

Meh, I don’t really even have a witty comment to make. Probably the only thing that comes to mind is good riddance, and what an absolute moron. He threw away his entire life for nothing. All of the money he stood to make from football is gone. All of the potential on-field success and accolades are no more. Most…