Players shall sit out the first half of the season opener.

OH MY GOD

Lets get this sorted out early, are we going with #bellghazi or #alarmgate?

Not even the Rock can get Roman Reigns over.

This article was great, and I loved seeing everyones reactions on Twitter last night. I am the wrestling fan that said he was going to quite WWE but actually meant it. Sometimes I watch the PPVs with my friends (like last night) but I gave up on Raw and following the stories (because fuck spending 3 hours of my life…

"need you home a sap"

The technical legal term for trying to defraud someone out of $4,600 when you've earned $80 million in your career is "gilding the Lilly."

Dennis III busts out that lollipop grin and Shaq looks like he's pissed, but realizes he doesn't have to go to the free throw line.

Oh, now the Ravens have a problem with their players smacking a bitch.

With all that's gone on this year you'd think Baltimore players would know better than to hit a bitch.

He then went on to claim vaccines cause autism.

1st half, deflated footballs: 1 TD, 1 INT

Brunell was emotionally shaken up because he had just gotten off the phone with his accountant moments before the segment aired.

"It's such a shame that people are focusing on whether the story is true."

Scott Hall makes doing "suck it" look like he's on the verge of a heart attack

He's obviously not fat. Anybody with two i's can see that.

"If the Patriots can tamper with their balls then why can't I tamper with mine?" - Marshawn Lynch

Police Academy

Can't beat this Indiana fan's insightful comment, replying to his local station's story: