According to a 2013 study by the American Journal of Sports Medicine, there have been about 12 per year since 1990 in high school and college football combined. I’d guess most of those are in high school, given the greater availability of immediate medical assistance at college games.

You realize your whole life has been leading to this moment, right?

Gotta give props to the guy, though. He was responsible for half of an 0-16 season, ran out of the back of his own end zone, has career stats that look like a mediocre season for most starting quarterbacks, and yet he’s spent 10 years in the NFL and made several million dollars over the course of his career.

Do you then hang up the phone and let out a long, evil laugh afterward?

If boner pills had been around in 1908, you can bet your sweet ass Fred Merkle would’ve had no problem endorsing them.

The only times I’ve watched 2 Broke Girls is when Kat Dennings’ impressive cleavage is on the screen and I become hypnotized for a couple of minutes. I feel like it’s time well spent, even if my brain cells are jumping off an imaginary cliff like lemmings.

Devonta Freeman: (scores two plays later, violently slams the ball into the ground)

Has there ever been a rap video that didn’t include strippers?

I think you’re asking for trouble, mixing Pokemon and Nazi souvenirs. It’s like your closet is a mini-Axis state.

So it’s essentially the same as Central?

.... and a shit ton of cocaine.

That’s exactly what they want you to think.

If he’d have been able to hang in there for another 5 or 10 seconds, he might have won. Shitting on your opponent is a more effective finishing move than a chokehold or arm bar.

You point out the woman, who looks to be carrying the next generation of Bills fans (which means the baby is already drunk and giving blowies to its own umbilical cord), but no love for Zubaz Pants Guy rushing in at the 20-second mark to serve as a blocker for the grill?

Well, the comparison between Aquaman and Tannehill is valid.

1) A survival knife (the kind with a hollow handle that contains waterproof matches, a compass, maybe a flint/magnesium fire striker, and fishing line, plus a longer blade) is much better than a pocket knife, if you have time to prepare and are planning for a worst-case scenario.

Depending on your local climate, you shouldn’t skimp on the sleeping bag. You don’t want to hit the road with one that’s only rated to 30 degrees if you’re going to spend a winter outdoors in Minnesota or New England.

I think the Wrestlecrap guys do. Losing TNA is going to be to them what it would be like for the rest of the world to suddenly lose access to fossil fuels.

Good luck with that. Stephen A. Smith is the Jason Voorhees of journalism. He’ll never die and he murders every aspect of the profession that he sees.