Superbitchery?

Considering how much they’re going to suck this season, it makes perfect sense they’d take on the look of a black hole.

The good news is, Kelly’s offseason maneuvering has made sure the Eagles will suck enough in 2015 that they’ll be able to pick whatever Oregon quarterback they want in the 2016 draft. So, you see, the plan is working.

Well, the last handler grabbed him by the jaw. The other handlers now call him “Stumpy”

I think people in Tijuana pay good money to see that sort of thing.

Tell you what. When hippos, snapping turtles, crocodiles, etc. al, develop opposable thumbs and the wherewithal to build human zoos, they can chuck as many watermelons at me to eat as they please and I’ll do my best to entertain them.

Never had pickled watermelon, but I’ve seen some recipes for grilling watermelon. Tried it once. It turned out OK. Probably would’ve been better with a better cook.

Well, if the girl was suitably impressed then OF COURSE he had a protruding bone. Duh!

Just please, for the love of God, make sure it’s a polar bear and not a black bear.

That turtle is another reason people who go hand grabbing (or “noodling” in some vernaculars — it’s reaching into a hole in the riverbank to catch catfish with your bare hands) are fucking insane morons.

“THIS ... IS ... MILWAUKEE!”

Four hall of famers taken in the first five picks of that draft, and the Packers managed to pick one of the biggest busts of all time. And yet it still worked out better for them than picking hall of famers did for the Lions, Chiefs or Falcons.

Except his really smart brother from Chicago is smart enough not to give Gregggg a job, so that he doesn’t have to listen to Gregggg’s brand of dipshittery all day long.

There’s also rules on how many days in a row they can play, conflicting off days, logistical problems (they might have the same off day, but one team is on a west coast swing and the other on the east coast), etc. The White Sox also don’t come back to Baltimore again, so they can’t just turn one game into a…

Took me about five years of living down here to figure out that Coke is the southern name for soda. I used to get confused as shit when someone asked if I wanted a Coke, then they handed me a Dr Pepper.

There was TP at your school? Must have been one of those fancy suburban schools where people don’t piss all over the toilet paper and the stalls actually have doors.

Looking at it some more, you’re also trying to read WAY too much into her posture.

Who’s the fella owns this shit hole?

Letting 30,000 people spill onto the streets — whether they’re just heading home or not — and into an already tense situation probably would not have helped matters, FWIW.

She’s an Islanders fan. On some level she’s been taking a beating her whole life.