They really do have this very impressive cognitive dissonance. I’m actually rather envious.

It’s like they decided to curb-stomp both Jesus and the Constitution at once.

They’d have plausible deniability if they hadn’t said “this” Christmas heralds the coming of a new King.

I don’t see how this is a question. It’s not even veiled.

The main takeaway from this election: the bulk of Mormons genuinely believe the ethical redlines in their scriptures, the bulk of evangelicals are exactly the craven amoral fucknuts everyone else has always suspected.

It’s amazing that the guy who “tell it like it is,” and “says what he means” is always so fucking incomprehensible.

It’s not just his Tweets, it’s almost every thing he says or writes. Every freakin’ time he says something, one of his mopes has to come out and say what he REALLY meant was..., or no, you’re too stupid to understand what he said, or he was just joking you guys, or flat-out no, he didn’t say that despite physical…

And also don’t become president.

If your tweets are so vague and incomprehensible that you need someone clarifying them the next day, maybe you should stop tweeting. If you are the President-Elect, then YES you should absolutely stop tweeting.

WTF. “Um, thanks for correcting me. I guess this means that Christmas is not a holiday, and you don’t care about the quality of my New Year’s.”

You know we’ve crossed over when “Merry Christmas” becomes a weapon.

#allsolsticesmatter

This image confirms my suspicion that Eric Trump is now a vampire lord, and Don Jr is a life-like wooden puppet that Eric controls.

This is what I don’t understand. It literally takes NOTHING away from me, a white person raised Catholic (now an atheist), to be more inclusive with people. You know what an inclusive holiday party means? It means learning about different cultures, different people, and different foods (the most important). Like…

Still not as scary looking as these two

As frightening as these images appear, it’s still a cool opportunity to learn about deep sea biology. I wish Gizmodo had identified the creatures.

Try Happy Solstice. Would upset them more, I think.

Honestly I like Happy Holidays because (as another commenter noted) that it covers the full spectrum of holidays, but lately I say it just to be an asshole. Like, the entire world doesn’t revolve around you and your magical-and-unproven-white-guy-in-the-sky, fucker.