Cant take jalopnik serious anymore when it comes to CVTs. Get over it, they arent going away and they arent that bad in fact I think they are great and Subaru has the best CVTs in the business.

This is a deep OG Grover Golden Books reference, and as someone who read his original childhood version of this book to his daughter last night, respect.

This is like Grover’s monster at the end of the book. I know you say “WARNING: THIS POST IS NOT A JOKE.” but damn if I don’t want to read it anyway to see if it’s a really good joke.

Pretty sure he would have missed all of them anyway.

Victor I gave you a star because I feel bad. Your girlfriend may not exist, but well...actually neither does the digital star on the internet. But it’s the thought that counts dammit!

Announcer: SANTA MARIA!!!

You’re gonna hurt people's feelings

Make it a bench seat and you can count me in.

Jeep,

There is not a racist bone in her body

Bledsoe caught the ball, he should not have been removed from the game.

Samaria Rice: Police shot my 12-year old son at point blank range.
Robert Kraft: Yes, I too was arrested for paying a woman at a massage parlor to jerk my dick. We are the same.

*Cue “Circle of Life”*

McCarthy was like a father to Aaron.

[Rob Thomas looks at the score]

“He’ll put you in the trash can from a mile away.”

How much you want to bet they still made him wait for his boarding group number to be called before he could get on the plane?

Uh, did Timofey Mozgov bring guns to the locker room during the term of his contract and ask his own teammate which of them he’d like to be shot with?

True Detective season 4 casting prediction: Michael Keaton

I didn’t have it pre-written. I’d long since given up on the idea that we’d ever need it.

My first thought upon seeing this news was, “I should text Albert!”