where will i be able to anonymously make fun of people i deem lesser than myself

I always find it hilarious when people make sweeping statements about a baby’s character while they are tiny infants, as if they will never ever change. In this morning’s DirtBag there was Molly Sims and her 11 week old so calm, never cries baby and now it’s Princess Charlotte, the 5 week old easy…

This cake was $1,000. I repeat, this cake was $1,000. Our baker arrived two hours late, with a cake that looked nothing like the sketch she provided. And this was a woman who had been featured on Style Me Pretty and Martha Stewart Weddings. When it came time for cake cutting, my husband said “What the hell is this?…

Laura Prepon is seriously fucking gorgeous though.

(yes I know she’s a scientologist. no, I don’t care.)

So much nope in that. I would have literally punched someone in the goddamn face. I paid so much to get my makeup done and even got airbrush foundation (which always makes me break out) if someone even attempted that I would have had a full scale meltdown.

My aunt Bonnie’s second wedding was a small affair in Lake Tahoe. Her cake was from a chain grocery store, which, since it was located Tahoe, did regular wedding cake business and had a pretty large bakery section. My aunt’s fiancé, Steve, picked up the cake the morning of the wedding and came back to the cabin we…

I wanted a 3 tier square shape, small and simple. My ex husbands mother claimed to be the cake boss of the rural south and “could whip that up easy peasy.” She kept me up to date on cake progress and everything she was super stoked, and I bought the hype. Come the day of our wedding (April fools day actually) we get…

Nice way to cast dispersion on one of the most important jobs anyone will ever do:

This makes sense. I knew I was very high risk for postpartum depression so when I read these studies promoting the benefits of encapsulating the placenta I was all on board. It was pretty disappointing when I still got hit with a very severe case of PPD. So one less thing to blame my body for failing at. Woohoo!

Sure, women have been giving birth without medical intervention for centuries. And wow, it’s like modern medical technologies have had no impact on maternal death rates and infant mortality rates! It’s like nothing has changed at all!

I am a fucking hippie. I freely acknowledge this undisputed fact. I homebirthed. Loved it. I buried all four of my placentas in the yard and planted a fucking tree on top of them. I breastfed way past my kids being able to have full conversations about how and when they would like to nurse. I coslept. I made my own…

So stupid. The reason their sales are plummeting is the same reason Lululemon etc sales are plummeting: they got too greedy. The price of the clothing has crept up while the quality has dropped drastically. I’m not spending $150+ on some paper-thin piece of sweatshop crap that will pill and unravel after two washes.…

This post is full of all kinds of win.

Seriously. I’m an atheist, and I’ve always wanted to go to the Creationism museum just to see it in all of its crazyasfuck glory. I just have never had a good reason to be in Kentucky.

They annoy me only as much as overload of any kind of pictures annoy me. You post a picture every so often of your baby? Great! You post a picture every five minutes? Unfollow! I don’t care enough about anyone’s baby/cat/diet/workout routine/job/etc. to wade through 1000 photos a day.

I will bet $10,000 that those parents would not notice if you didn’t “like” it. I unfollowed most of the parents in my network because I gdaf about babies/kids and no one is mad at me for not liking their photos, just like I’m not mad at anyone for not “liking” my beach pics from vacation (the #1 “If you didn’t have…

A co-worker of mine asked if I wanted to see her baby pics. I said no. Her expression was priceless. As if I said I ate a baby for dinner last night. I’m not fucking around. I don’t care about baby pictures. They all look like potatoes to me.

People who get irrationally upset over baby photos freak me out. It is the MOST INNOCUOUS SHIT EVER. No weirder than anything else friends post.

I think that you probably just did more to reinforce why people think 'snobby' wine people are insufferable, than you did to refute it.

Normally I'm really into Katie's articles, but this one is filled with so much bitchy judgment that I can't even wrap my head around it. The whole last paragraph is just fucking gross. I hate weddings...can't stand anything involved with them. Showers, bachelorette parties, etc., all make me cringe in dread. My…