Nice of him to at least use a self-portrait.

“Yeah, now stick the foot in your mouth. Yeah, yeah, that’s it.”

Make America 8-8 again

Idiotic blowhard with a big mouth likes other idiotic blowhard with a big mouth. Not surprising.

“I’ll have a cheeseburger, Frenchfries, and the ice cream sundae... Oh, and a vanilla milkshake.”

I read this in Bill Walton’s voice, and I couldn’t understand a single word of it.

Some people in the greys are boring liberal scolds like myself, who enjoy Old World wine, Multicultural Cuisine, Australian-style Gun Control, and being completely ignored in the Deadspin comment section.

Who Gat

Sports are supposed to be an escape from reality. If I wanted to hear someone complain about ‘not in the face’ I would have spent the afternoon in bed with my girlfriend.

Wings fan chucked the damn thing onto the ice in the third period, for no clear reason.

Did she post this course on MapMyRun?

#BlackTopMatters

What did they expect when they hired a kid named McLovin

Big deal. I do that all the time. It happens. I usually have a 12 pack in me, but still.

I’m a Pats fan and this just embarasses me. We need to get back to what real football should be about: pelting Goodell’s Maine home with poop-filled paper bags, not filing frivilous lawsuits.

“Yankees are a bunch of douchebags” - sing it to the tune of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles theme song..it’s fun!

“Hello, friends! Which one of you wants to pull really hard on my necktie while I jerk myself off to completion?”

Ack! I first wrote it in Roman Numerals but when I switched to numbers, I totally messed up the translation. Thanks.

TNT was UNC’s Team Stream. It was purposely biased. The regular broadcast was on TBS, bro