Ugh. Not funny, Jason.

I did the family hockey pucks as a kid. I asked how long to microwave the rolls - put them in for 10, Mom said. So I did. Around 9 minutes later, she found out why units are important...

I am personally scarred by your story.

Thank you for this story. I'm sorry for your experience, but it really turned out sweet and made me smile. Happy Thanksgiving!

Every family has had rolls turn into “Hockey Pucks” at least once. The true horror is the my shithead cousin that has been asking “who brought the hockey pucks this year” for the last 30 years. Fuck you Jason, I hope your wife doesn’t introduce this stupid anecdote to her new in-laws.

That’s really sad. My parents are divorced but they are both still in touch with each other’s extended families and are invited to each other’s events, for example when my dad’s niece got married, my mum was invited. My dad’s younger brother told her “you might have divorced him but you didn’t divorce us and you’re…

I’m glad you have found happiness, that sounds like a rough time you went through. My sister-in-law announced a few weeks ago she is looking to get a divorce, and instead of hosting thanksgiving as she always does, went to stay with her grandma with her son for the week. Her mom isn’t supportive and her husband is…

This is my first Thanksgiving since divorce. I’m really struggling with the idea that people I considered family are now strangers, and that if I ever marry into another family (or someone marries into mine), it’s a conditional relationship. My Dad loved my husband like a son and now will never talk to him again.

This story only starts out like a horror story. It was horrible for me at the time. My boyfriend and I were celebrating our first Thanksgiving together. It was also just a couple years since my Mom died, a loss which had blasted a huge hole in our family. We scattered after that and had Thanksgivings either alone or…

Stories like this make me especially glad I come from a family of intellectual types. That sounds like a nightmare.

*People can be wrong without being awful about it

Holy SHIT.

You win

This is a sad, not funny story, but Thanksgiving is always a little bittersweet for me because it was the holiday I realized my first marriage was over.

as a Brit, I don’t celebrate Thanksgiving (seriously, guys that’s a damn strange holiday) so it looks like I’ll have to come back later and bask in all the schadenfreude because Jezzies never let me down with pissing contests.

I just lost the tip of my finger to a mandolin not 30 minutes ago. First thing my boyfriend says? “Yeah, honey, that thing is really sharp, you need to be careful with it.”

One time my college-age brother, who is bipolar but refuses to be medicated, felt that Thanksgiving was an appropriate time to hold himself hostage with a gun to his head in the back yard, demanding that our dad give him money (more than he already was) to buy drugs. So then the cops came and he was forcibly strapped…

One year we all had the flu on Thanksgiving day, but my mom prepared dinner anyway, even though none of were up to eating, or even getting out of bed. You know how sometimes you’re too sick to even watch TV? We were that sick, all of us, but mom went ahead and started cooking.

Ok, when I was like 11 or 12, I was at my cousins house with a big group of family, 20-30 people. After dinner, all the kids wanted to play hide and go seek. I went and hid in the closet of the guest bathroom which was adjacent to the toilet- big mistake. After a few minutes, one by one, family members would come in…

My mom cut a big clunk out of her finger when she was using the new knives to cut veggies. She didn’t know how sharp they were. My aunt had to finish while we tried to stop the bleeding. As she was cutting the veggies she smiled and said, “This knife cuts very good.”