I can deal with most of the modern safety features, mainly because I drive in such a way as not to trigger them.

I think Buttigieg’s nomination is actually pretty interesting, if you care about politics. This is a guy who has just vaulted himself from mayor of a small city, to a Cabinet post running a department that is in itself half the size of said city. He did it by raising his profile with a presidential run—one that was…

“What’s Something In Your Garage That Might Be A Relationship Red Flag?”

Probably a granitic rock, so it will weigh around 165 pounds per cubic foot.  Call that boulder, averaged, 30 inches by 30 inches by 48 inches - that’s 25 cubic feet and 4125 pounds. 

Because even in extraordinary times, it’s our bureaucratic red tape that separates us from wild animals.

A decade is just a ten year time span, so the end of a decade is really just ten years from any point in time. Every year, every day, and every second is the end of it’s own respective decade. It’s all relative. So December 31st, 2019 is the end of the decade that started January 1st, 2010, regardless of your feelings…

During the 80s, the Hollywood profitability ratio was 12 to 1. We made $12 of ticket money for every one of ours spent. During the 90s, that ratio fell to 3 to 1. Our filmmakers had become dependent upon experimentation. They had lost some of their recycling skills. Now, Top Remake was created to teach ACM...…

Terrible people, like dealers, use misogyny as a multiplier for terribleness.

you end up charring everything into a coffee brown rock hard mess.

No way does a storm trooper actually throw a pitch into the strike zone.

I honestly don’t think that’s the right thing to be worried about. Cloning a key fob and physically stealing a car is ridiculously easy, and I am pretty sure that’ll remain a much more likely thing for you as an individual than anything else. Much in the same way that being robbed for your devices is much more likely…

I think Ron would have made a show of supporting what Trump claimed to support, but would have then at the last minute agreed to go on a fishing trip with Leslie on the promise that neither of them would vote (Leslie already secretly voted for Hillary absentee, which Ron would know, and pretend he didn’t know).

You’ve gotta pay all over again, unfortunately. 

I think it could be the opposite. If it’s 100 they’ll peacefully arrest them. If the guards start to feel like they’re going to be overwhelmed, they’ll shoot (and rightfully so). They won’t need to murder a half million people though. When people hear the first gunshot, “funny shit to do that I read about on facebook”…

I think the thing is, forget about the head gaskets thing because that isn’t a problem anymore. There are plenty of other Subaru problems to pick on.

Maybe if they smiled more.

I like to think we’re all children at heart.