Y la dinamita hace boom!

You can’t teach height!

That’s an excellent point.

Also, they used a Metallica font and an AC/DC pun. Jesus fucking christ.

Which is almost a shame because Sugarman is the single best name for an opioid dealer to have

I will say, based on my personal knowledge of time spent with Eric Sugarman, his email reads exactly like he was chewing out the idiots who let a bottle of pills go missing.

Deadspin commenters can see the future:

It’s not written by a convicted sex offender, so there’s that.

Can I write-in vote Brass Bonanza? Because the NHL needs Brass Bonanza.

That and what seems to be $30 million more from the Texans.

Held the pizza sideways. Pizza’s ruined.

Redskins Facts botches another one.

well played Samer.

After hitting the haple77 7ideline guy in the head, Kaepernick offered a meager “I tried to warn ya’ll the 7torm was coming and you just said I was being in7en7itive.”

Baltimore. Another game coming down to the wire.