When a friend of my family got married, her dad wore a Packer tie and vest that clashed horribly with the gray tuxedo and their FRAMED “ownership” certificate was on the alter at the church during the ceremony and next to the cake at the reception. They had an official wedding picture taken with the goddamn thing.

I live in Indiana. The day of last year’s AFC Championship game, I was at the grocery store and, while deciding which Sun Chips to get, I heard the following exchange between two guys near me: