Sounds like a great way to meth up your Mac.

But I know Big Deodorant is trying to poison me!

Mee-ee-ning.

Don’t go in August (hot AF). Early January is nice.

Food babies. Never heard that one.

“...that they shouldn’t be expected to do less with more.”

Now that’s some bad aiming.

“Peter Thiel, famously a friend to journalists, and just a cool-ass guy to invite to a dinner party in general.”

So people could drive on the sidewalks?

Hopefully prison butt muscles.

“Secret Sperm” is a holiday tradition around my house.

I first thought it said, “Sexism Is Magic,” and thought My Little Pony was getting quite a bit darker.

Self-correcting problem.

We could go visit our manufacturing jobs.

Can someone please shit in this guy’s taco?

If I can find them without being a paid writer, then you can too. Since we don’t know you personally, your words represent you.