Perfect respo.

I love kids who clearly dgaf about on-air interviews. She would so much rather be eating animal crackers and playing right now.

My South Beach jeans are still around, mocking me to this very day.

Yet another asshole associated with the Kardashians. Gross money people associate with gross money people, I guess.

I have total respect for otherkin and soulbinders but transethnics are crossing the line.

it's so delicious when the same people screaming "don't silence anyone!!" use threats of violence to try to silence others.

Our little buddy had too much fun at our wedding. He's a pretty big party animal, if you can't tell.

Dear Geoffrey Miller: Don't presume to lecture anyone on "willpower" while issuing mea culpas featuring the word "impulsive."

My God. Brad Pitt has The Rachel!!!

In the case of Ethan Hawke & Uma Thurman, HE broke up his marriage. The nanny and/or Angelina didn't force him to cheat/leave.

The People story about Dax Shepard and Kristen Bell going for a walk is hilarious. The writer was grasping at straws saying that their baby was "getting used to the good life in Southern California" because it was being carried by a parent. I guess two-month olds outside of SoCal walk everywhere by themselves?

I've got you beat by 7 years and about 5 times the drinking.

I hear you. It doesn't automatically mean that we're going out and getting naked on spring break or getting blackout drunk on our couches just for giggles. Hard-workin', hard-playin'. So what if we like to go out for a mimosa (or ... many) after a 5K?

Thank God they're finally making being thin and beautiful socially acceptable.

You raise a good question. I'm going to go with "showing said anal sex video on the Jumbotron in Times Square during New Year's Eve."

What's more private than filming anal sex with the most well know male porn star in America?

Q. That wasn't a question.

Being close to the same age as her, I do envy that she's managed to retire ahead of me.

I am generally not a consumer of diet anything, but I will say that I had a Skinny Girl margarita once and it was the saddest thing I have ever tasted.

This dingo needs to learn how to smize. This is like such a fake smile, what a bitch.