Also, after the WH press corps soiled itself over Michelle Wolf calling Sarah Sanders a liar, Giulani just confirmed that, yes, she’s been lying to them for months. Do you think any of them will call her on it?

So, Trump is going to tweet in a few hours that Giuliani has never been his lawyer and he barely knows him, amirite?

But you are, moron. You’re conservative as fuck. We’ve seen all your posts.

God, all these Trumpets on here today.

In a sane world, Colbert would be too ashamed to even bring up his 2006 WHCD performance. It was one of the most awkward, halting comedic performances I’ve ever seen.

Stephen Colbert as a character on The Colbert Report was a caricature of Bill O’Reilly (on the show he would regularly refer to “Papa Bear” O’Reilly)

He means Bill O’Reilly.

Hot take (and I sincerely believe it):

Nope.

Nope. Conditioner isn’t oil. (Although there may be some oil in there as a “story ingredient”: something nifty-sounding that doesn’t do anything.) It’s things like polydimethylsiloxane, an organosilicon polymer that binds to hair like grim death, even when there’s shampoo sloshing around.

“Lather, rinse, repeat”: scam to make us use twice as much shampoo?

Mitch Hedberg already answered this.

That assumes that you will die and not wind up in some kind of semi-broken or vegetative state.

Also the guy that John McClane shot THROUGH HIS OWN SHOULDER to kill at the end of Live Free or Die Hard.

He’s Seth Bullock. He’s Raylan Givens.

The world needs a talk show where Timothy Olyphant is always the guest and the host changes. I would be like the Jeopardy of talk shows.

Jalopnik always writes these articles explaining how loans work.

People know how loans work.

Um, how is he a hero when he drugged and raped young black women?! Because what you’re doing is prioritising the unearned reputation of a black man over the lives of black women.

What planet are you from? Be honest.