See, you seem like you don’t enjoy life. Be more like Usain Bolt!

“The single worst thing that has ever happened to an Armenian”

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Did Bofa get signed though?

Ehhhhh, I mean all the photos are from the event they’re covering — the nomination — and Hillary Clinton wasn’t there. So kinda hard to get a photo of her. The USA Today one looks terrible.

Oh great, jellyfish have learned how to post internet comments.

This is the least fun thing anyone has ever said.

Money can’t buy rock bottom, it can only delay it.

So.....Emperor then?

LeBron James is 6'8" 250 lbs. If you saw a guy like that in a bar you aren’t picking a fight with him. Don’t be an idiot.

I’m not great at spelling, but Benghazi has a “Z” in it.

Counterpoint: Nah.

Headline: Bald Eagle Pummels Canadian Goose After All

Are you Dadboner?

Votto doesn’t like to play baseball the Wright way.

It’s almost as if one plays inside in air conditioning and the other plays outdoors and occasionally in bad weather on a natural field.

Damn, Daniel.

I realize he’s a jackass but I still feel bad for this dude, and for everyone struggling with substance abuse issues.

“Although I truly believe this encounter between us was consensual, I recognize now that she did not and does not view this incident the same way I did.”-Kobe being honest as shit

Every second you watch your little “marble race” could be spent reading the works of Dostoevsky and even the great Shakespeare. I won’t be joining you on this fool’s errand. Good day.