Lots of commenters here apparently don’t know this very basic baseball rule.

I think it’s at least fair to argue whether there is a qualitative difference between protesting during the anthem when playing for your club team and protesting during the anthem while playing for your national team.

Few classes of people in this world are as batshittedly convinced of their own influence and importance than college newspapers nerds and jesus fuck I miss that world so goddamn much I’m 32 and my DEEP AND IMPORTANT COLLEGE NEWSPAPER EXPERIENCE made me a legal editor in a hidden kingdom of batshit crazy conservative…

I’m looking forward to the accessories, like a needle for the Tom Brady figure, a letter for Cam Newton from the Panther’s medical staff saying he does not have a concussion, and a crutch for RGIII. Oh the possibilities.

Whatever the legal standing, it’s morally reprehensible. As was outting a gay man, no matter how big of a jerk he is.

So they cut out a useless middleman. Sounds like good business to me.

I was REALLY skeeved by a supercut of all the “sick burns” that were thrown at her during the roast. It was all sexist bullshit making fun of her looks...like...THERE’S SO MUCH MATERIAL THERE, WHY GO FOR THE SEXIST HACK JOKES?!?! I know we all hate her, but it doesn’t make that shit ok.

In my day they stapled kids hands to their sandal straps so they would know not to fidget like that. Schools these days are too lax. We need more discipline!

Sorry, no. Teenagers are assholes and need to be taught by assholes to become bigger assholes. Wait, that’s business school. Never mind.

Yes it is, it’s a fantastic teaching mechanism.

I think the only person who loves flags more than Brees is Brandon Browner.

‘All’ of the episodes...

Wes Welker then went home and gave a similar interview to his desk lamp.

This piece was pretty annoying. I’m a female and I enjoyed the episode, as well as the previous two. Please don’t use Jezebel as a podium to whine about things you don’t understand due to lack of interest. My unsolicited advice: If you don’t care, don’t write about it.

I was jerking off when the bulletins came across the TV saying Diana had died. Totally ruined my efforts. No need for a re-try in 10 minutes, it was no use. Thanks a lot, Diana.

If you don't have any other reasons then, you should find a tall bridge and jump

Inside is a reason to turn that “thing” on bud

Not the first time they brought Viking clap to the European mainland.

What about being hit by a car? If anyone could excel at that, it’d be Lebron.

My favorite thing as a little girl was staying in the luxury hotel in Marrymore and not being able to pay the inn fee. The hotel makes Mario work as a bellhop for however long you overstayed without paying. Did... did anyone else do that?