I kind of wish “Maerd” would catch on as a yoonique name like “Nevaeh” because it’s the word Dream backwards and kinda sounds like the word for shit in French.

Any other day and time, I would get all snarky about this shit, but right now? I’m only sad that there wasn’t some sort of nod to Al’s Pancake World.

Thank you! In the other post, I ranted about why I’ve had enough of the entitled white male schtick. Just shut the fuck up. Shut the fuck up. This is not your election. This is mine.

Well, you have finally done it, Jezebel. You have turned me to #Team Pie. I never thought this day would come.

STAB IT WITH THE SWORD OF GRYFFINDOR IMMEDIATELY

Guys come on.

Shade? Shade.

I don’t pretend to know the whole story here, but what a bitch.

One bled over the cuckold’s nest

somewhere between 8 and 9 i assumed it was jessica chastain proudly displaying the remains of the last person to ever confuse her with bryce dallas howard.

To be fair, it was a different era. In 1998, urinating in other people’s beds wasn’t as big of a deal as it is today.

From my coworker Jordan Sargent:

This is straight fuckery. I asked Siri right after I read that first article how tall Barbara Bush was and Siri said four feet tall.

No, just Pandora’s Mouth at this stage. The Box is phase II.

SEE

I’ll never understand Australian horse racing.

HOW HAVE I NEVER NOTICED THE FACE ON THE SCALE?!?!?

...did I miss something? Who are Mathews, Scannell, and Field?

Did they have a brain tumor for breakfast?

Be forewarned.