Unfortunately, your true statement saddens me: "I called them the only way I knew most people would understand."

Can we please stop calling men's tank tops "wife beaters?"

Excuse me, people… graham crackers and milk? A treat for breakfast growing up and sometimes dinner as a grown up. You can also turn it into a race against time before all the crackers get mushy. And they have the new smaller packages so they don't get stale as fast. Sweet! (P.S. I happened to have had a bowl…

How about dead woman #8?

WIFFLE BALL TONY!!

There seems to be a handful of these programs in the greater Boston area but with dogs- my son's school had a reading to dogs program. Also, my dog has gone through the training to be a therapy dog. She could be one of those dogs but she's not that cuddly and will spend most of her time looking for food.

Add "oh my" and say hello to alcohol poisoning. Damn- I think I just outed myself for reading it…and the two sequels.

My stepfather died of lung cancer one year after being diagnosed and two (or so) years after surviving a quintuple bypass. Fortunately for us, we was somewhat lucid until the end. Eighteen months later, my mother died of pancreatic cancer. Fuck cancer and the fuckin cancer it rode it on.

Coroners and Medical Examiners can make their conclusions based on pieces of information other than their autopsies. They use reports from police, toxicology, ballistics, emergency rooms, mental health, ambulance, etc. In Massachusetts and most likley in most states, there is a Motor Vehicle Crash Reconstruction Unit…

Coroners and Medical Examiners can make their conclusions based on pieces of information other than their autopsies. They use reports from police, toxicology, ballistics, emergency rooms, mental health, ambulance, etc. In Massachusetts and most likley in most states, there is a Motor Vehicle Crash Reconstruction Unit…

I'm confused about the directors's chair "joke." I read about this a few days ago and that post explained it and said that Mohr was referring to the chair breaking because someone without wearing Spanx was sitting in it. Spanx doesn't take away your fat- it just squishes it together. I can't even come up with the…

Only wine? What about a shot of tequila a week?

Thanks. Thanks for that. Merry- effin'-Christmas to you, too.

That's hilarious! Jessica Biel…with someting to do. Classic.

I only have one thing to say and it's not clever.

OH MY GOD YOU'RE RIGHT!! I knew they looked familiar! I'm kinda scared as to why they changed the name.

Maybe those girls had consciousnesses and were sickened by the 13,200 of boxes that were destroyed last year because… wait- why did they do that? Oh- Just. Because.

…and speaking of asshole pets during the holidays… my dog eats everything- including a Duraflame log. (FYI: it's not toxic.) Wait- she doesn't eat everything: she doesn't like green beans. When I give her mixed vegetables with her dinner, she will PICK OUT the green beans and leave them on the floor. She has also…

My cats drank the water in the tree stand. Someone suggested I cut up citrus fruit and hang them near the trunk to deter them (with the smell). I think they just got used to it. Apparently, pine/orange flavor is refreshing. Who knew?

I'm embarrassed to say… I know she's wearing the Ugg's between takes (or whatever they say). She's wearing heels for the scenes you will see in the movie.