See, I want to say that this is the greatest DBZ animation in the world, but I know that it’s not; it’s just a tribute.

I try not to make up stuff when talking to customers. I do IT work now, and when I tell people that their new password has to contain a capital letter, a lowercase letter, a number, a special character, a haiku, the poop emoji, and your favorite smell, you would be surprised how many people take me seriously.

The last time I remember being asked if I worked somewhere, I was in my work uniform, but at the wrong store (Wal-mart, as it were). This particular day sticks in my mind because I wasn’t asked if I worked there right away. In fact, of the THREE DIFFERENT CUSTOMERS that just asked me a question as if I was an…

OK. I think I’ve figured it out.

Just hurry up. Ghandi and his nukes are coming to achieve diplomatic victory.

See, I hear this song, and all I can think is, “This sounds a hell of a lot like Icky Vicky from Fairly Odd Parents.”

Is it one of those 7 meter body pillows? Jesus is my snake waifu?

I am reminded of the story of the man caught in a flood. He sits on his roof, praying. A boat comes by, and offers him a ride. He says, “No, God will provide.” A helicopter descends, and offers him a ride. He says, “No, God will provide.” He dies, and at Heaven’s Gate, he asks St. Peter, “But I thought God would…

That is a serious offense, you know. Their protractors cut deep, and the yardsticks rain down in fury.

Pop isn’t soda? Perhaps we need to step outside and discuss our differences.

Ok, this is neat, and I will buy one. But how do we make Twitch play it?

I still play this song everytime Fly Away shows up on my iPod. It’s a compulsion.

Discovered this in the process. Apparently, this guy remixes all the weirdest stuff. The instrumental version is also out there, and the video for that is even better.

I have an uncle with the same name as one of the Miracle on Ice players, and we live in Minnesota. Every 4 years when the Winter Olympics comes around, he expects a few calls from local sports reporters or radio stations, asking for an interview. He doesn’t reveal that he’s the wrong person until they ask him…

When your bro forgets to say “no homo.”

The reflect and counter damage was different in previous games. I honestly didn’t know that they changed this. I did spend more than a small amount of time in Melee trying to double-Roy counter a full Game and Watch bucket. If memory serves, it was about 250%.

So he is very fun to be around, but when you insist that he’s just not right, he gets all defensive? Oh my God, I figured it out:

“The dipshits are a proud race, whose tradition of honor and respect have survived through the centuries. I am proud to be representing an organization that strives to follow the ideals of the dipshits, and I am insulted that you, sir, would disparage their good name.”

So, Dreamworks’ How to Train Your Pokemon. I’d play that.

As long as it’s not a pachinko machine.