Just “should be ashamed”? No actual gif of a finger wagging to accompany your salty-ass and off-base attempt at starting shit on a slow Saturday night?

That entire country of Brazil is on your side on this one.

Those are the hands of a 71 year-old who has never worked a day in his life.

That headline and accompanying photo! This is exactly what I was hoping for today. <3

Perhaps this fine couple could meet their neighbors halfway- keep the word but include as part of the context of the larger quote; ““...try to find out in [your] hearts why it was necessary for [you] to have a ****** in the first place. Because I am not a ******. I’m a man. If I’m not the ****** here, and if you…

God, I would love to seat the three of them around The Slapping Machine.

I’m just going to keep posting this because I don’t know what else to say anymore:

My guess is that her nails are still drying. Alien nail polish dries a lot slower than human nail polish.

Weeping. That child sounds SO TERRIFIED.

I was actually going to say “she looks like an extra on Zombie Strolling, the Thai bootleg version of The Walking Dead”, but I decided against the longer joke.

I know you’re not talking about her contouring, but can we include that contouring in the larger disaster assessment? She looks like an extra on Walking Dead.

Came here just for this. Thank you ! <3

Last I checked, Wyoming doesn’t have a penis museum.

No, The Beast isn’t unique to Trump, but I imagine that there’s some value in bringing up The Beast’s protective qualities –namely that the wood ain’t gonna do shit to the car so prosecuting this kid excessively would be silly. I don’t recall hearing about Obama prosecuting tweens (which is not to say that I agreed…

No, The Beast isn’t unique to Trump, but I imagine that there’s some value in bringing up The Beast’s protective qualities in an article about a kid throwing some wood at it –namely that the wood ain’t gonna do shit to the car so prosecuting this kid excessively would be silly.

I was expecting “noo-kew-lurr”. I was comforted by the fact that he reliably mispronounced “industry” as “in-DUH-stry”.

When he pronounced “nuclear” correctly at the press conference this week I almost fell out of my chair. Just when I thought we couldn’t surprise me anymore!

Do we need a Snark Court column for white people now, too? I think the ruling would be in your favor here.

You stated with album and ended with show.

Oh, is that why Macklemore beat Kendrick Lamar in 2014 for Best new Artist? Daft Punk beat him for AofY? Artistry is inseparable from politics and message. Art isn’t just beauty or “what I like to put in my earholes on my commute to work”. I’m not dense –the Grammy’s aren’t awarded for actual artistry.