“No, honey, Santa is real, that man in the mall is one of his helpers!”

As I hoped, Call of Cthulhu came in the mail on Friday, and I made decent progress Friday night. On Saturday night I spent a lot of time in the insane asylum, which was, in my moderately inebriated state, both confusing and upsetting. The stealth probably isn’t particularly challenging when sober, but when I was…

Ah, my bad. I assumed that because you seem buy into the bullshit that an atypical number of Sanders voters didn’t vote for Clinton (there’s always 10% who don’t vote or switch), you also buy into the bullshit that this swung the election. I apologize for lumping you in with a wider group of morons than you actually…

I had no idea that was Glenn Close. It’s the boo box for me. 

Wait, just to be 100% clear: Sanders lost the primary because he was a dumbass who ignored an important region of the country, but Clinton lost because jerks failed to vote for her? Not, say, because she ignored an important region of the country, assuming it was safe? 

Thank you for for exposing me to this delightful British filth.

Uh, accordingly to that video, Mark Hoppus can’t sing any more? 

We won’t all be dead by 2050, but those of us alive will be in a Mad Max hellscape.

Why do you consider yourself fortunate to know rich people? 

Oh, I didn’t realize he got that much from the settlement. I feel sort of weird that the family of the man who died (apparently) got so much less than the guys who lived, but good that Walmart might have gotten less than all of it back from their insurance company.

How does Tracey Morgan have Bugatti money? 

Salmonella from the eggs is unlikely if you are using store-bought eggs, as they’re all pasteurized. E. coli from the flour is the bigger danger (witness the Aldi flour recall that was covered on this site). Microwave your flour (or bake it in the oven) to heat it to 160 degrees, then mix up your dough. Enjoy!

Shouldn’t you be cowering under your bed clutching a rifle?

Whoever is doing the subtitles for these is definitely a valuable member of the team. “wet chewing” was a great final punch. 

Irony is dead! Painful sincerity is the new flesh!

I don’t remember much, and we definitely didn’t get the whole run, but I remember Bill, the flying kung fu guy (manners with Billy Kwan?), and then just general impressions of the show. I liked it a lot, but it wasn’t my true love - KITH also aired on Comedy Central at the same time, as did MST3K. It was quite the…

Men can have yeast infections too, son. They’re just not nearly as common (and not caused by eating raw cookie dough). 

I’m skeptical! Skeptical that you think that Almost Live was only available in Seattle, when it was in fact repackaged on Comedy Central in the early 90s! 

Jesus CHRIST dude how are people’s sarcasm detectors this broken?!