Ladies and gentlemen, the 28th state to enter the Union, but the first in your hearts and your nightmares, Texas.

I don’t want to de-grey any of them, but if you like this post, read the pending responses. They so valiantly struggle to articulate their rage, yet they fail so completely. It’s both horrifying and sad, and slightly funny, like a seemingly pregnant woman doing a bump.

Jesus Christ. Snorting coke while seemingly pregnant.

Commentor 1: Bullshit?

I’m sure it’s an unpopular sentiment, but I prefer this version of Janet Weiss to the one in Sleater-Kinney or The Jicks. She’s great in all of them, but there’s just more Janet in Quasi.

Dear Deadspin,

It is healthier. The idea that’s its somehow my or your fault that we’re within an economic system that integrates into its fundamental structure both underemployment and optimal unemployment with regard to the NAIRU is ludicrous.

I’m more of a ranter than a silent sufferer, so, nah. I’ve experienced long periods of unemployment, but even longer periods of underemployment. Underemployment crushes the soul. With all sincerity, good luck searching.

This song. This song is a sad anthem. If, once a moment of time occurs, it somehow, somewhere continues to exist, then there are many, many moments of me in a cubicle listening to this track on repeat.

Who’s rooting for a Rangers/Mets series to see Colon pitch to Fielder?

If the “many worlds” theory of alternate universes is correct, there could well be a world in which we domesticated bears instead of wolves.

Following the long tradition of George W. Bush and then Rick Perry, Jerry’s just announced a run for President.

You know, Zappa’s still Zappa. As far as I know, no one sold his catalog to Michael Jackson. When I listen to his music, I don’t see images of sneakers.

Seriously, there’s 9 Lowe’s logos on my screen simultaneously. 9.

Great. This gives me a reason to watch tonight’s game to watch for daily fantasy ads. So far, TNF has been sponsored by Lowe’s, quite prominently.

Gail Zappa’s death was announced today.

Yeah, but I only feel bad for one of them.

After that game, I had the same conversation with my liver.

You know, if they actually got Jim Brewer the commercials wouldn’t be as annoying.

As we should have learned with Reality Kings, if there’s “Kings” in the domain name, somebody’s going to get screwed.