Divorce is so unseemly. Somebody has to die.

It’s MADNESS. Let me tell you about one particularly hellacious afternoon. I was leading a group of students around a gallery and before we went in we did a (1) do not touch the art (PAINTINGS. OBVIOUSLY DO NOT TOUCH PAINTINGS?!) talk and then (2) another one in front of the art about the appropriate distance to…

Where I work, at the Museum of Amazing Stuff, life is a daily litany of please do not touch/do not touch/WTF DID I JUST SAY ABOUT NOT TOUCHING. I have been known to tell my audience, when giving presentations, that there will be no touching and I will smack hands if it happens. It helps if I am holding a ruler while I…

Signage is actually a huge point of conversation and debate amongst curators—they go mad trying to figure out what variety of “do not touch” will result in less touching in museums. You have to engage in all sorts of amateur psychology. Like, just writing “please do not touch” will result in people wanting to touch.…

Because the emoluments clause only applies if Trump is given a “present, Emolument, Office, or Title, of any kind whatever, from any King, Prince, or foreign State” and the RNC is none of those?

ITS GODDAMN BLATANT!! WHY IS NO ONE SAYING ANYTHING???

“Republican committees and groups including the RNC, congressional campaigns, and the Republican Governors Association have shelled out a total of almost $1.3 million to Trump-owned businesses this year.”

YES. That struck me immediately too. But she knows exactly what she’s doing because every trumpster I know loves her because she is so “gorgeous” and “classy.” And I hear this more from his female supporters than the males.

What bothers me is her stupid fucking modelesque pose. Bitch, this is not a fashion shoot. That pose was unnecessary.

Ivanka forgot her hat.

What a dumbass. Not only can trying to view the eclipse without glasses burn your eyes, but the eclipse doesn’t really look like an eclipse at all without the glasses unless you’re in the path of totality, at the moment of totality. Without the glasses, the sun is too bright to discern its shape.

Another shot. This is the president of the United States literally trying to view the eclipse by squinting at it.

Oh great, now he’s blind and we are going to nuke the sun.

Why can’t these dumbfucks learn the difference between stuff that goes on between consenting adults and an adult—usually a straight man—raping a child?

I love going from being able to punish reckless Zenyattas to being punished by reckless Zenyattas.

I really hope they go the rehabilitation route, rather than the punishment route. At 15, there is a very good chance that 3 years Of hospitalization and therapy could turn her into a productive member of society. 10 years in (I’m assuming) an adult prison and you’re pretty much guaranteed a psychopath at the end.