blameitonthecroutons
blameitonthecroutons
blameitonthecroutons

On my 21st, I went to a casino to play blackjack. I hit when I had 17 and it was a full table. I got a four, the dealer ended up with a 20. Everyone at the table was pissed, and I’m told I was making this face to my table mates:

At this point if I were a Kardashian, I’d be looking at a stranger’s gift of a fancy car as a Trojan Horse. With tiny robbers or one regular sized burglar, hiding inside ready to slip inside my house and steal all my jewelry.

On my 21st birthday I got so drunk I started throwing olives and limes at a bartender, was dragged out of the bar by my boyfriend and woke up with a tree branch in my hair.

Donald Trump slapped his second-most slappable son, who was wearing a Yankees shirt at the time?

Do I believe they called him “Diaper Don?”

Your comment (and probably life) personified

Wearing a Jose Fernandez shirsey right now, actually.

So he doesn’t want her to die. He just wants her to be punished for treason by being shot until she is no longer living. But. He doesn’t want her to die. Those are different things, you see.

Man, this comment is depressing for you.

Yeah look at all the bad things that have befallen the Blackhawks in recent years.

you are this upset about a team of people you don’t know losing a game? Imagine how you might feel if your people were virtually exterminated over a span of hundreds of years, thrown onto reservations, and forced to watch what was left of your people and culture become a caricature for a baseball team....

Not only is that racist on the more blatant level, where they’re trying to keep black people from voting, it’s racist on a secondary level in that they think handing out weed and liquor is what will do it.

Ellie, you guys doing a story on this? I honestly feel like I’m living back in the Jim Crow South these days.

I play a game where, after I tell somebody I ride, I wait to see how quickly they start talking about motorcycle accidents in some way. Then after they inevitably do so, I tell them, “So I play a game where, .....”

Oh man, my Dad sure loves a twist ending. Best way to finish, in my opinion.

Now playing

Honestly, I wish they had gone with Radney Foster’s new song because of its strong anti-Trump message and because it would shut up all the “country music=rednecks” morons. But I guess they wanted to go for pseudo-controversy rather than real controversy:

The only Ross that had more fun with wood was Bob.

Remember when Republicans though the entire Justice Department was in the tank for Clinton when Comey said Clinton shouldn’t be prosecuted?

The FBI is LITERALLY in the tank for Donald Trump.

Oh for fuck’s sake it is not. A week ago every single person would have said that they’re in the tank for Hillary.