Thirteen year old me had pretty terrible taste in men. See Johnny Depp, Kirk Cameron, Scott Baio, and that boy in my eighth-grade class who become a hedgefund bro and helped break the global economy.

Bernie Bros who hated Hillary with a misogynistic furor created a sexually hostile work environment?

I’m Getting Married was FANTASTIC. The Staten Island couple where the husband forgot he was mic’ed and hulked out on his limo driver because he was late, and the wife had overfilled her lips so much they gave her a speech impediment. GOLD.

Anybody else remember that one dude who got calf implants? I still randomly think about him a few times a year...

went all the way to an In-N-Out only to do an exercise and eat a fruit.

Ohmygod: you just retroactively explained “American Beauty” the movie.

I only want her to be Mattie Ross in the Coen Brothers’ True Grit and wish she would be reasonable and put her hair back into two long sensible braids and spend all her time bossing people around whle using olde-timey words.

Who the fuck orders New England Clam Chowder in Hawaii? 

I recently read somewhere that, lately, Kid Rock has been looking like Dr. Phil dressed up as Kid Rock. I’ll never get that image out of my head.

You failed to mention Miss Japan also had a costume-in-parts! Girl came out in a transforming ninja-to-Sailor-Moon outfit.

PENTATONIX IS TRASH GROW UP

They are literally so boring that I was confused by the header image having seven members for at least 30 seconds before I realized two of them were plants.

It was on the Richmond side. That’s the tricky thing about bats... you never see them until they want you to! (But really, you probably have. If you’ve ever seen what you thought was a bird after sunset it was probably a bat. Thoughts and prayers that they never decide to roost in your half enclosed tunnel!)

KFC and cologne : (

The subtlety is key. Poised, yet salty af. Yes Michelle. Serve. 

Someday I’ll tell you how I almost met-and most likely probably would have married because of course-Bruce Springsteen, but my mother ruined it for us.

Sigh, my kid. She is OBSESSED. She’s also 5 so she fits right in with the intelligence level of the show. 

People whose Mama’s don’t cook with salt and pepper.

I always like to tell this story, because it was probably one of the few amazing things that’s ever happened to me.

I was very fortunate to score tickets to this a few months ago. It’s a wonderful show.