I accept your terms.

You had me until you told me to “slice open with a sharp knife.” You never slice a potato open with a knife. You create a dotted line from end to end with a fork, and then squeeze the ends together until the skin bursts open. Slicing leaves a smooth surface that butter will slide right off of. Using a fork and…

I’ll give you one on the condition it has to be delivered via overhand throw.

It was definitely this man’s unlocky day.

No, but I have naturally luscious eyelashes.

They put it in the welds.  That’s how they can say it’s bumper to bumper.

Came here looking for this. Am I leaving satisfied?

I am that friend (I used to sell my soul cars). I offer all the time to help people. Exactly one has taken me up on that offer. People all the time come to me after they bought to get validation on their “good deal”.

See, they install that TruCoat at the factory, there’s nothin’ we can do, but I’ll talk to my boss

Easy fix: Use your turn signals.

All bodies turn to worm food eventually too. Houses turn to rubble. Food turns to shit. All things we justifiably spend money on.

Well when you spread it over 96 months, even a new truck payment can be made to be under $400

and now the mad dash to usurp $kay’s throne begins...

No. The middling Clinton strategy has gotten us in to this mess. No thank you.

I wonder where they drew inspiration?

Article 0/10, does not compare measurements/performance to one of these

This seems overly judgemental, and inaccurate.

You’re going to sit here in front of all these people and Jesus and tell me those are three different people and not just a photo of the same sad dude at 3 different points in his life?

Ah... that’s the ‘before learning’ picture...