You want a medal or something?

Yeah the using-your-children-as-an-excuse-for-why-you-couldn’t-possibly-be-guilty-of-sexual-assault ranks right up there with one saying they can’t be a racist because they have black friends!

Bears eat beets.

The Kyrie-Jaylen Brown backcourt quietly becoming one of the best in the league. Tatum is now yamming on people. Next season, Irving-Horford-Hayward-Brown-Tatum with that bench might be a real contender

Well, that’s debatable. There are basically two schools of thought

i have been biased against mollusks as food by being fed oyster stew by well meaning but ultimately harmful grandparents. perhaps one day i will overcome this prejudice but not today.

You can’t live three years?

I really wish I could live long enough to see the scholarship that develops around the eventual American fall.

El Popo is scary as fuck, and has been really active recently. Don’t let that get in the way of your narrative though...

my boyfriend would like you to know that i took artistic liberties with my portrayal of him here

Sean McDermott was the defensive coordinator with the team that employed CAM NEWTON. It’s insane to me that he’s so ill-equipped to implement a more spread-style offense!

Parcells was kinda rough on him with all the “she” stuff, but he respected his talent enough to bring him to Dallas.

I had forgotten this - caught Tom Brady‘s first NFL touchdown pass in 2001

This morning Kellyanne Conway was on TV telling Alabama voters to vote Moore because Doug Jones would raise your taxes.

The GOP, the party of racists and child molesters.

I thought the last 10 months would have been sufficient warning about the dangers of replacing a competent black man with an inexperienced and unqualified white guy, but here we are again.

More like he’ll need Poise because he just wet the bed.

(Said this on Facebook, but should repeat it here)

For clarity’s sake, the Asperger’s reference is from the most recent episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm, where Larry David pretended to have Asperger’s to get out of a jam. Hence Larry David Brand Asperger’s. It’s not a dig at Asperger’s. It’s just saying that LaVar Ball…

Yes, people rotting in foreign prisons for insignificant non-violent crimes is a miscarriage of justice.

5. making people who are usually turned off by Ball’s antics (people like me) root for him (because fuck Trump)

I got out of the Marine Corps in 2009. I am absolutely certain that he is going to face the wrath of the Sergeant Major. I know for certain he will pay through the nose. He will likely lose rank, get extra duty, be volun-told for every crappy detail that comes up and face the contempt and ire of every one in his…