I liked that time he forced a better shortstop to play third base for the rest of his career.

It’s Jeter In Butt Land, and it’s not close.

Dumb people don’t get that a drunk girl can’t give consent and prior sex and being horny isn’t a green light.

Holy shit! You’re Dexter!

There is so much truth to this. When working, I’m that upbeat, cheery person in the office who brings everyone coffee and candy. But if you look over my shoulder when I’m goofing off, you’re as likely to see gruesome autopsy photos, or bloody surgeries, as frolicking kittens.

The drying rack full of dildos is funny, but washing them in the kitchen, where the food is, seems... not right.

So much Yes for the stop swiping! A male, and very cute, plastic surgeon got a look at what is probably the biggest dick in the Western US. Guy had sent it to me before an unfortunate accident which required the visit to the plastic surgeon. When the doc asked to see pictures of my accident, he starts swiping! I knew…

“I took a bath, I shaved my legs, I washed every nook and cranny. So you can fuck me anywhere, even in the fanny. Love, Annie.” - letter my mother in law wrote to my father in law, as forever burned into the memory of my then 10-year old husband who discovered it. And later mine.

Okay. I need advice. I’m old, so the only things people show me on their phones are pictures of their kids or their dogs. I always ask whether there are more pictures and whether I can swipe. They always say yes, and I look at dog or baby pics until the scene changes to a mountain or something.

Not me, exactly but the two women walking toward me in a sporting good store. That was the moment when the zipper on my sport bra gave up the game completely and unzipped so fast I could not even react. Both sides of this stupid bra pop out of the sides of my summer dress like weird ass wings and oh boy, did I wish I…

This might not count but when I worked at a nonprofit and I caught a glimpse of my corowker’s screens, it’s always the complete opposite of their personalities. So a cold, mean-spirited colleague will have a yoga pose, or really sweet gentle colleagues will have some bloody zombie photo.

I discovered porn when i was waaaaaay young, prolly 8? I walked into my parents room with my younger sister, and my dad was making a copy of a porn on his VCR that was hooked up to his friends borrowed VCR. He had left the door closed and the sound low, but we wanted to watch cartoons, as he was hogging the TV in the…

There are two kinds of people in the world...

I’m 14 in 2002. Back then everyone in the family shared a PC. No individual smart phones, tablets, or laptops like kids nowadays get to have. So we shared time on the computer between me, my sister and my dad.

One time I got this series of texts from my dad:

People seriously have to stop swiping when somebody shows you a pic on their phone. You have a single view license of that particular photo unless you want to see a pic of somebody’s butthole.

I have found my dad’s porno collection numerous times. Dad isn’t good at hiding it.

I couldn’t figure out why a mustache was so upsetting... you mean porn stash! :)

Once, while visiting an elderly neighbor, she asked me to get her reading glasses from the middle desk drawer. They were there, alongside a clear quart-sized ziploc bag filled (FULLY FILLED) with teeth.

I didn’t lay eyes on it, thank the universe, but hearing my sister have sex was highly unpleasant. I don’t know if she was putting on a show for her partner or what, but she was in the upper echelon of noisemakers.