Every meteorologist needs a gimmick. For the rest of his career, poor Justin will be required to use a Facebook filter, even after Facebook ceases to exist. And that’s the way the cookie crumbles.

Close,

I was reading the piece thinking, please David, don’t tell us you made made an offer.

As a joke, I was going to write:

“does John live right on the ocean?”

I’m trying to buy it.

...evolving into a bit of a rust-enthusiast (not fetishist).

I am sure it scoots pretty good now seeing as how half of the weight is gone and I fail to see the aforementioned “solid frame”.

My adblocker was registering 111 blocked ads. One Hundred Eleven.

You could, but not many people would want to pay for a towncar service that showed up in a clapped-out Escort. ;)

$30k for a used taxi?

“And tit comes standard with a dry-sump oil system that has three scavenge pumps”.

Allow me...

If you’re in California, riding a motorcycle can significantly shorten your commute.

No, i already mentioned something that was a waste of time, energy, money and resources.

You’d prefer he go to church? 

“I can prove I’m God. You can’t prove I’m not. Now, how can I prove I’m God? Well, there are six definitions for God in the American Heritage Dictionary, and number five is a very handsome man, and my wife says I’m a very handsome man, and nobody argues with my wife.”

Oh, glad you cleared that up for me!

It’s a funny thing about exhaust pipes - make them as loud as you want, they still point behind you, alerting the world of your departure not your arrival.