The only statue in Baltimore that could use more protection is Joe Flacco.

More like “a conscious uncoupling from the program,” amirite?

Idles much like a 4-stroke, and then seamlessly transitions to “big chain saw” sound at higher revs. Amazing stuff.

Shania Law: “Trump Don’t Impress Me Much”

Sir, this is a Wendy’s drive-thru.

It’s “lede,” not “lead.” Glass houses, and all that.

The difference between a Cactus and a BMW X1? A Cactus has pricks on the outside.

Heaven help us if Hamilton Nolan sees this.

So the Red Sox are still stealing signs then?

“Oh you’ve got 60 cars for us? Only $3,000? VW’s? Oh diesels? Aren’t those being bou... Hmm seems legit. We’ll take them...”

That’s what happens when someone forgets to lock the dieselgate.

Charcoal is wonderful, but you know what else is pretty good? Turning a knob, pressing a button, and having a hot grill ten minutes later and then not having to deal with a cauldron of ashes a couple hours after the meal. That’s decent, too.

Seems dumb for a stadium named “Levi’s” not to have a section 501.

Never change, Jason. Never change.

Back when he was still with the Eagles (maybe 08 or 09), I ran into Andy Reid at Home Depot once. He was incredibly nice. It was in early September and the Eagles were getting ready to start the season. There is a Home Depot in South Philly. About 2 miles from the Linc. He is pretty easy to spot. So I went over…

Breaks

Sweet Jesus

Jay Peterman, world famous seller of clothes and the best the Jets could scrape together to play QB. They were also going to make history by bringing in Elaine Benes to play wide receiver but she refused to take off an Orioles hat to put on the helmet so they had to cut her.

I can’t be the only person who thinks Matt Stafford and Sam Bradford are the same person, right?