Our kid eats pretty healthy: fruits all the time, veggies reasonably well, etc.

Stop being an annoying pedant. The rest of us adults know what boats are in the context of the question asked, and what you’re suggesting is not it.

Moon landing? Exaggerate much?

Cuban’s right: NCAA games are ugly to watch. I tried to sit through the title game and just couldn’t finish it. It was so painful watching them trade sloppy, pointless possessions marked by a bunch of standing around followed by terrible shots that I had to turn it off.

Hahaha, back from a long weekend and this is the pathetic response you came up with during that time? Print your lesson on a piece of paper so I can wipe my ass with it, because that's all it's worth you sanctimonious blowhard.

Hey, a real QB would’ve iced the game long before it got that close. How many Super Bowls did Montana lose from the sideline?

Green Bay, actually! Seriously though: if Pete Carrol doesn’t brainfart that ending, Tommy Boy’s batting a mere .500 in the biggest game of all, and winless since the D carried him to 3. What a choke artist!

Really, you read all my posts that fast? In only 12 minutes? Hmmm, you're either a liar or the world's greatest speed-reader. Which one could it possibly be, I wonder?

Wings fan here, and I happened to be in Detroit at a relative’s house watching that game. Holy shit was it tense, but the relief when The Captain stuck it in was unbelievable.

This is the answer. The side benefit: we don’t have to put up with Bill Simmons claiming Brady as the best ever when the truth is he was a game manager bailed out by his defense in every Super Bowl he ever won. (Mild exaggeration, but not by much.)

You think you're clever, but you're not. If you bothered to read my post completely—you can read, right?—you'd have seen I clearly named religion as a protected class. I then proceeded to explain why, in fairly easy-to-comprehend words, how a gay baker would have merit to argue that he wasn't discriminating against…

"Carving out special rights...."? Dude, we're not carving out special rights: we're asking business owners—who ostensibly serve the public at large, and who are subsidized by the public at large (in the form of tax breaks, public roads, emergency response, etc.)—to not summarily treat a group of people as…

None of these are particularly good examples, because none of them truly involve an immutable characteristic of the potential customer. Religion, race, gender, and age are protected classes, as should be sexual orientation across this country. So to answer your scenarios:

I'm married to a pure, born-in-the-islands Filipina and know waaaaay too much about their obsession with beauty. Her along with her family and friends (exclusively Filipino by the way; they are a very insular sort) spend vastly too much time, effort, and money attempting to look good. The damnable, shameful irony of…

Who are these pearl-clutching prudes, and how can we get them out of the gene pool to prevent contaminating future generations? Suck a dick you judgemental douchebags.

I'm a simple man, so I only need:

Beauty pageants are total bullshit and a waste of time, but that's a damn fine looking woman. Eat a dick, xenophobes, and appreciate a gorgeous human.

Purity of your daughters? Listen up father/mother: with an attitude like yours, they're going to turn into the biggest sluts around as soon as they're out of your house.

Drop the mike girl/dude/mister/ma'am/miss/dr./[fill in preferred honorific here], 'cause that was fucking brilliant. 'Nuff said.

Thank you, numerous times over, for attempting to give this specific Purist some perspective on how damaging their uncompromising, impractical zealotry can be.