bitcholaporvida
bitcholaporvida
bitcholaporvida

My white mother-in-law once went on a rant about “weird” names and said she was so glad we didn’t name our daughters “something awful like Mercedes. Who names their kids after a car?!” My name is Melissa and I looked at her and said “I was originally named Mercedes, after the Virgin Mary, but I changed it when I got

Maybe they were just looking out for me. I’ve spent the past half hour using different apps to test it out and my face just doesn’t work for that cut. Also, my hair is fine and straight and if I’m being honest, I’m way too lazy to use product to make it look good.

I was thirteen when Zombie came out and I wanted to cut and bleach my hair like her in the video but my mom and boyfriend talked me out of it. I’m tempted to go do it today. I loved her.

To be fair, I’ve never liked Kate because I fell in love with Prince William when I was nine years old and read about him in my mother’s Enquirer.

I think she looks modern and chic whereas Kate looks like a Christmas bear. Well played, Meghan!

It would be better to invite her, have her sit in the front, and make her smile and eat shit while everyone watches. Not literally but you know what I mean.

I want to be your best friend because of that Grace and Frankie reference.

Fuck.this.shit.

*reads* “Everything about this People story on Selena Gomez’s mom is heartbreaking.” *thinks* “Obviously this is the first thing I should read today!” *two minutes later* “Don’t cry at your desk! Don’t cry! Chug your coffee!”

I follow her on IG and she wears so much white, I can’t take it! And I mean that in a good way. I won’t even wear a white t-shirt because I will inevitably get something on it but J. Lo routinely wears ALL WHITE EVERYTHING. She’s amazing.

What?! No way. We all know that when a female says she doesn’t want to have sex, it means they just aren’t turned on or in the mood so the dude has to work harder to get his lady ready to go to Bonetown! C’mon brah, everyone knows that!

I was addressing the author, not Salma.

“...Hayek, as a then-struggling Mexican actress” Right. Hayek has never struggled. She came from a wealthy family and by the time she made Frida, already had double digit films under her belt. Saying she was a “struggling actress” lumps her into the group of all the other women who have zero power in this situation.

Um, wtf did Amber Heard say? I read all those words but I didn’t understand any of it.

No, not at all, but I don’t think anyone should be sympathizing with him. He did something awful and should be held accountable for it. And yes, by losing his job he is being held accountable and that’s fine but I think people should also be cognizant of the fact that there are a lot of black and brown men who don’t

“I’m going to be just fine.” Truer words have never been spoken. Don’t worry about Al Franken because he will be just fine. Just like every other fucking privileged white man. I wouldn’t even be surprised if Weinstein makes a comeback tour in a few years.

Tiana from Princess and the Frog.

I am not ashamed to admit I love this! Come at me with your Jersey Shore was the beginning of the downfall of society and all that mess, I.still.love.them.

“Crystal Gardenia, Crystal Gardenia Citrus, and Crystal Gardenia Oud” So...gardenia?