Just make sure you’re ahead of the game, baby!

I’m fairly conversant with both the orientation and the concept of multiple partners but we have a diverse crowd with varying degrees of bi-literacy here at Jezebel so I’m certain others will benefit from your bi-n-poly 101.

I will add, again for their benefit as I’m sure you’ll agree, that I see no reason why a…

I'm partial to Smack the Pony. (The show and the euphemism.)

Thanks! And yeah. Because she’s all unstable and shit and probably she’s straight, anyhow.

Ugh, it really does. “As this story went to press, so don’t come running to us when drama surely ensues. “

I wasn’t sure what this meant. I’m feeling dull-witted this morning, though, so maybe it’s self-evident and I’m not getting it. Help a girl out?

I don’t know if this is possible in your area but a tailor is invaluable. It’s hard enough for average people to get things off the rack that fit in every way but Muumuu Syndrome is a way of life for the tall ones. Focus on accommodating the height (arms, torso, legs) and get the rest tailored to fit. Most important…

A couple of years ago I was defending myself against a boss who was a verbal bully. We were both standing, which was unusual when she was berating me, and I realized that if I moved one...step...closer I could gain a non-verbal advantage. So I did. No regrets in that case though I try to be careful at other times not…

Yep. If I’ve got heels on I have to OWN IT. Like make-a-drag-queen-cower-in-fear own it. Because otherwise I just feel like a cow.

OH FFS

tepid coffee out my nose (thankfully)

Succinct. I wish he’d be like this more often. I’m still smarting from his Ford interview.

Even before MCA died those lines would get me. This is from Sure Shot which is one of my favourites. Off to YouTube with you!

It’s true. So, in lieu, I’ll go with the man himself. Heavens, he’s cute. And the statement couldn’t be more apt.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

I wish I could find a gif of Moss putting on his bigger glasses for what turned out to be something not bigger-glasses-worthy.

I’d already borrowed against tomorrow’s WTFs when I saw this.

Possibly the weirdest example of “the best revenge is living well” I’ve seen.

Ok, what I really love about this comment is that you don’t indicate if your son is biologically related to you or if he was adopted. *heartfelt applause*