*screams*

“I HAVE TO HAVE A LOUD IMPORTANT PHONE CONVERSATION IN THE COMMON AREA SO NO ONE FORGETS HOW IMPORTANT I AM I’M THE MOST IMPORTANT LAWYER MAN AROUND” my experience from working at a number of firms.

I’m not in a science field, but in grad school, I had That Guy in my class — the one who never does the reading or homework but can’t stop participating in discussion.

Well, NO SHIT.

Whoa...how fucking cool would it be if this new Indiana wasn’t his namesake granddaughter....but his grandmother? I would be so down to see the franchise continue with a female adventurer in the Gilded Age.

Oh shit. This #metoo thing found my breaking point. DO NOT CANCEL PROJECT RUNWAY. Thank you for your time.

Why the hell are they making another one with Harrison Ford? At his age it’s gonna be Indiana Jones and the Buyers Of The Reverse Mortgage.

I don’t trust them either - if you read the fine print, most of these companies “own” the data from your DNA once you submit it. Plus - what if some wrong-doer (like a Cambridge Anlytica type) hacked their data? I am not sure what they would DO with the data exactly, but it creeps me out.

dear everyone @ greenpeace,

“If Chick-Fil-A would just stop offering chicken sandwiches,” reasoned Kushner, “I would eat there.” “It’s just so controversial,” he continues, “because little chickies are so cute. What about offering burgers like McDonalds. I mean, pigs aren’t that cute,” explained Kushner as he ran into the glass door.

Why is is that so many people don’t know about the Hyde Amendment???

I’m not sure if Jared and Ivanka are aware that the Hyde amendment doesn’t permit federal funds to pay for abortions, and PP also survives on private donations.

I hope this never happens because I’m just one abortion away from a free FRO-YO on my PP punch card.

I would donate money to a goat if it ran against Ted Cruz. That said, Beto is an utterly fantastic candidate and I’ve been giving him money from over in Ohio for a year or so. I’d love almost nothing more than to see Chunky Soup removed from his position. (see also: Randy Bryce v. Paul Ryan).

I was very skeptical of O’Rourke before i went to hear him speak at my college. The event took place in one of the few buildings with a lecture hall able to fit 100 or so people, and even then i was lucky i was able to find a seat due to the standing room only crowd he attracted, let alone the hour plus i stood in…

Unseating Cruz is absolutely a long-shot, but the thing about long-shots is that they pay off now and then if you play enough of them. And wave elections almost always include a few “Whoa - how the hell did that happen?’ results.

I’d be interested to see the data on where contributions are coming from. I threw a couple bucks his way along with Randy Bryce and I can’t vote for either. Unseating Cruz and Paul Ryan seems so symbolically significant to me, especially with their essentially complete bowing to Trump after their initial little show…

Holy shit you weren’t kidding.