Bonne fromage!

I've only ever heard one version of this song, by the bounteously sweaty Johnny Hallyday. I can't believe he isn't on this list!

Disqus, let me guess, at the pool you're the one in speedos and black socks.

I love swimming pool smell! I know its just chlorine, but I just love everything about pools and swimming. If we had a pool I don't think I'd ever come out. Do people have swimming pools in their yards there? Its so hot there in the summer, wouldn't it be nice if you could just get home from school and sploosh…

How about respecting physics? Only the crappiest furniture breaks when someone collides with it. Double pane windows might crack, but they don't shatter when you thump up against them. Glass bottles are basically clubs. Very little has changed since the idiotic bar fights in old westerns!

Disqus, I'm not going to soften my words, you stink.

I think I understand what you mean. I think that is really nice to be always looking out for people's feelings! When Mrs Grin talks to you sometimes is that what she does, desu kedo? What I meant in movies about straightforwardness was more about like literal conversations. Like, talking about the weather, or…

The Spanish version is undeniably more cinematic in the contemporary sense. But if you prefer slow, stagey, still and quiet as I do, you will find Browning's Dracula to be a wonderful experience! I love it from Swan Lake to its nearly silent conclusion. And of course it is no small treat to see Bela Lugosi at the…

Disqus, when we insult you, we are not being ironic or sarcastic or anything. We mean what we say.

When people can't catch sarcasm they are definitely offended by me all the time. I wonder how many people out there hate me because they think I said something that was actually the opposite of what I meant. I kind of rely on people to realise that I can't possibly be serious! I don't know if there's a difference…

Disqus, the new Archie has a character named Disqus who just goes around stepping on everyone's toes for no reason.

I did see the new Archie! They're making Jughead a loner weirdo again and even giving him back the big S on his sweater which was always kind of mysterious because why an S?

That is one of the saddest changes over the years, the gradual domestication of Jughead! In the earliest comics he looked like he'd just staggered out of an opium den. Sunken cheeks, dressed in rags, like he hadn't seen sunlight in years, he was a horrifying sight!

I'm trying my best to contribute too but all I can come up with here is maybe Tom Conway and George Sanders swapping parts somewhere, or something with the Barrymores maybe and then this wave of apathy washes over me…

Disqus, there's an ancient curse on my last post so keep your grubby hands off it.

Oh you have to have soda with pizza, don't you think? Water with pizza is just I don't know. It doesn't wash it down. Some people have coffee with pizza which makes no sense to me either. I can't imagine having pizza without something fizzy to go with it. And just like that I'm hungry for pizza. And I'm full of…

Disqus, you are a giant hotdog stain on the history of the written word.

Mum is doing really well, thank you! The stitches keep bleeding and I'm a bit worried they might have to stay in for longer than planned. She can't see them though because they're under her ear and they don't seem to hurt her, thank goodness! I'm the one who minds them because I don't know there's just something…

Disqus, I can picture you eating mustard out a gallon tub with a wooden spoon.

Your positive thoughts are working because everything continues to go well!