Thanks.  Now I’m hungry.  The good news is Portillo’s is now open.

I’m not going to get riled up about deep dish today, but anyone who chooses Gino’s East as their go to needs to be fired into the fucking sun.

“You’re doing it all wrong!” says the population of New York as they stand in the middle of the garbage bag lined sidewalks trying not to drip grease on themselves.

It’s bliss not paying attention anymore to these formless fuckwits. Call me when they get some new ownership and fire everyone in management.

GTFOH. Firing Tim Beckman didn’t damage Illini football. A dead horse doesn’t get any deader when you shoot it.

EXCUSE ME CINNAMON TOAST CRUNCH GETS A B? EXPLAIN URSELF KEVIN

“Why not an axe?”

Let me play the devil’s advocate here.

Christopher Robin is in his forties....his imagination isn’t as bright as it used to be.

Onion-cutting ninjas in mine.

Because you have a soul, you silly old bear.

Wow, there’s a LOT of dust in my office today.

The joke is the proliferation of increasing silly Dick Wolf Chicago TV shows, the fact that Second City produced so damn many SNL stars, and the impenetrability of improv terminology? None of which is the point of Don’t Think Twice? Like literally the only similarity in concept is the word “improv.”

But what about the Dwarf Star Conspiracy? The Black Ships? Hell we never found out about the Accelerated.

Jennifer Garner

Shatterstar makes me unbelievably happy

I cannot believe in the year of our lord 2018 Shatterstar is going to be in a #1 movie.

Kinda looks like Darth Vader got taken over by a Dalek.

I hope a bucket of paint falls off a ladder and lands upside-down on your head and gets stuck there and you stumble around with a paint-bucket on your head and crash into a ladder and fall down a manhole.

FINALLY, The Expanse Season 2 hits streaming in the US. It’s been on Netflix everywhere else for a long while (full disclosure: I live somewhere it’s on Netflix) but I strongly urge Amazon subscribers to watch it before Season 3 drops. It’s a great show.