Luckily, I have the option of fleeing to Narnia.
(locks self in closet)
LALALA I CAN'T HEAR YOU I'M IN NARNIA NOW

Facts is natural, facts is good
Not everybody does it, but everybody should
Facts is natural, facts is fun
Facts is best when it's one on one

Surely you don't think that Gilligan's Island was real…

They prefer to be called "furries"

Florida Georgia Line

So where the SMURF you at, punk?
Shut the SMURF up!
And back the SMURF up
While we SMURF this track up

"Who could do Marlene Dietrich as well as Madeline Kahn"
Kate McKinnon.

It's true! We're so lame!

He needs to come back and complete the trilogy. That's right: Zapped 3: The Zappening

McLovin

This reminds me of something I found on YouTube a few years ago: the complete Sci-Fi Channel series The Chronicle: News from the Edge, all 22 episodes in two big 8-hour videos, dubbed in Russian. And by "dubbed," I don't mean a voice cast of actors; I mean some guy speaking all the dialogue in Russian, in the same…

I'm not saying it was Alienists…

This is a song about a whale…

So… Jingle Belle?

And Kathy Ireland, twice.

Like a birth, in reverse?

Every once in a while, I try to track down the unaired episodes of Scorch. I appreciate what the show was (I think) trying to do: ALF with better special effects. It's a shame the character itself was so unlikeable.

Agreed. But then what? We keep letting children do it?

Nobody said they were victims. Of course I care about the girl they tried to murder. Which is why I want to know why they did it, so that we can prevent other children from attempting murder. Are you really so heartless that you want more attempted murders?

If you wish, but how will that prevent other children from worshiping online monsters? Children don't usually keep up with the legal news. These girls didn't try to kill someone because they were unafraid of the consequences; they tried to kill someone because they thought it was a good idea. Shouldn't that be…