If only all NFL owners had the moral fortitude to just not sign a headhunting sociopath, but let’s be real here. Not like he did something dangerous or distracting like, I dunno, refusing to stand for the national anthem.

It would probably be best for him to stay incognito for a while. 

Also, if the goddamn Chargers fuck me in my knockout pool, I’m going to fly to Los Angeles and beat Philip Rivers to death with several of his own children.

And so, the list of potential “John Dean”s continues to grow.

We absolutely need to keep Rudy babbling. Who knows what gems of info he’ll blurt out while not being an idiot?

What they care about is maintaining the old racist, misogynistic, rabid capitalist, environmentally destructive shitshow we live in because...anything else is too scary? I dunno.  

And brown mustard.

If we’re exceptionally lucky, the whole house of cards is collapsing around [current occupant of the White House].

Coulda fuckin’ fooled me.

Once again, the Clash were wrong. 

“I know you all are going after me. I know what you guys are doing with this.”

Does Giuliani have dementia too?

I’m not sure which is worse: The president being intentionally dangerous and hiding crimes on highly classified systems; or, the president being dangerously stupid, and having his people hide crimes on highly classified systems...

Not exactly. I think he was just an army NCO in charge of communications for Trump at Mar-a-Lago. Absolutely disgusting and very bad for security, though.

Man, it’s going to be a loooong weekend: Daily Beast reporting the former director of communications for US Army, now stationed at mar-a-lago, was just convicted of uploading kiddie porn to a Russian site. 

The President of the United States is a clear and present danger to the security of the United States.

Love how he refers to the CIA agent, who was assigned for this very specific task (monitoring the President’s communications), as a “rotten snitch.”

Yeah, some people just don’t want to understand statistics or math.

So much fucking this.

Ah yes, the people still mad at him for saying that there was a 0% chance Trump would win and 100% chance Hillary would win that there was a 1 i n 3 chance Trump would win and they don’t understand how odds work and consider that some sort of failure.