Fultz is probably the first person to go to the doctor and actually get excited when they find out they’re getting a shot.

It sure makes it seem like Fultz is at odds with the Sixers’ front office, and is possibly seeking proof that his injury is physical rather than mental.  

This is exactly right. If GWU or Duke or UCLA want to have basketball teams, they either need to run them as separate business entities, the way universities run hospitals, with players as paid employees, or else they need to have pure amateur teams where players have an 18 game season against local teams a school bus…

Probably not the first time Nero was inebriated beyond control in Rome.

Squirrel Hill in Pittsburgh is literally Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood. His house stands three blocks from the synagogue where today’s shooting took place and that little diorama of his community represented the community where this occurred.

Pro tip for Garrett Snider: When your bosses plant angel dust on you and give your job to some homeless guy, ask the hooker who looks like Jamie Lee Curtis for help. She’ll know what to do.  

gypped

I’m more than a little surprised at your usage of “gypped” here - can we at least try to move beyond casually dropping outdated perjoratives on Deadspin, of all places?

Drew, your attempt to deify Gagliardi made me sick. Gagliardi is what’s wrong with the new generation, who aren’t being MOULDED into MEN on the FOOTBAW FIELD. That’s why we have a bunch of pansies and losers today who take “no” for an answer instead of taking what they want, political correctness be damned. It’s why…

Yeah, well I was 12 in 1886. I couldn't afford such luxuries as "books" or "bicycles" because *I* was holding down a full-time job at the meat packing plant. Even got my face busted in by a Pinkerton during the Haymarket riots. Pussy. 

Naw, I’m a Bills fan, so the gruesome is all-that-more palpable.

I hope he heals up all right and can continue his career, but he really shouldn’t have been drinking and driving downfield.

Using the best in class 15% commission rate his $100,000 would bring the owner $666K in ancillary revenue. Assuming beverage cost of 20% he drove $533K in Gross PROFIT. No credit card commissions, no benefits (that comes out of that “astounding” $100K/year). I think any business owner would pay a salesman $100K for…

True story - what’s even sadder for that beer vendor is that his job doesn’t even provide enough to allow him to go back to his home in Kansas to visit his father. His dad had to use some of his retirement savings to travel to Landover just to be able to see his boy.

The cycle of history repeats itself, and the Reds are now owned by a Christian.
It’s like perestroika all over again!

Let me guess: the fucking Patriots are going to get him for a song.

Uh, he actually did. I mean, he totally killed people, but he was also consistently productive for them, right? 

his dog Jimbo was locked in a room, sitting in his own piss.

On a positive note, Jimbo can now check off “seeing the Eiffel Tower” on his bucket list. 

As a general rule, if you find yourself actually typing out the words “Oh, am I, Brenda?” you missed your exit.