Yowza, you just flawlessly described my relationship and only the names and places have been changed. Now I’m checking around me to see if there’s cameras filming my life like the Truman Show.

I’m really looking forward to my next salary negotiation with my boss where I chide him for valuing me only in the narrow terms of the revenue I generate and remind him that if he were to pay me more, people would generally be more excited to work with a much more prestigious me.

Men play a best of 5 in Grand Slam title, woman play best of 3, why should they get equal pay for less work?

So he’s saying they should play best-of-5 too?

I agree in principle with everything Murray says.

My wife won’t play scrabble with me any more because she doesn’t like doing things she can’t win. Also she accuses me of making up words.

Did anyone actually play the game in the manner it was designed? I remember seeing the commercials on TV when I was youngster thinking “oh, man, that looks awesome!” Then I’d visit a friend who had it, and we would start according to the rules, but a few minutes later we said screw it and just started building…

The trick is to keep a Dremel tool and some blank tiles under the table.

Sorry! is underrated here. I’ve literally seen relationships on the brink of destruction because of that game.

In 1977, you needed announcers. In hindsight, the technology was terrible. The screen graphics sucked, there was no superimposed yellow first down lines, not to mention the horrible broadcast quality (it’s hard for me to watch anything not in HD).

And here’s the greatest hits!

“All the stuff I’ve done in my career,” Don Ohlmeyer once told an ESPN interviewer, “and that’s what I’m going to be remembered for. It serves me right.”

They did! I tweeted that I was literally green with envy that I couldn’t attend or afford the new coffee table book, so maybe the Chrischanukwaanza fairies will be good to me this year. I’ve lived through a year of Trump, goddamn it! Shower me with Zombie goodness!

I’ve been watching the 1971 movie a lot lately because my toddler loves it.

Britney Spears, Spice Girls, that girl that dated Tony Romo, all great songstresses to view their videos on Mute.

Yea, Catholic and cash bar have never been used in the same sentence before that comment.

Cash bar was the problem. Cash bars should be illegal.

I like “Doing some paperwork”

pro tip on propane tanks — if you live in a town or city with a recycling center, there will be tons of old propane tanks sitting around waiting to be shipped off for scrap. take one of them and turn it in at a propane exchange center for a new, full tank. the people at BIG PROPANE have to test the tanks they get…

obligatory