“I can’t see straight.”

+1 +1 +1

Oh, come on. We all know MLS’s most pressing problem is the stupid names. Stadiums would be full, promotion/relegation would already be implemented, and an MLS team would win the Champions League somehow if not for the stupid names. Everyone knows this!

then every single time there is an article about Kobe, there should be some reference to the rape charge.

“WOW, Kobe REALLY wants it!”

Yeah, but he was grown with very few petrochemicals.

Do u think maybe he could shoot Common in the face, for all of us?

Damn, Marcia was pretty hot

What did the man just say?

If he works the equations hard enough, he can transform that gangrene into something positive.

A friend of a friend used a spoon to dig shit out of his ass because he was constipated from his heroin addiction. So, yeah, there are other things than cereal on which to use a spoon.

I assume Marcelo’s neck injury is due to whiplash from watching his teammates run up & down the field.

If you were wondering if the 6-foot-3 teen’s size, strength, and skills would carry over when pitted against adults, the answer is a resounding yes.

I think experts might tell you that there’s more to a lightning strike than the actual bolt. All the energy released has to go somewhere, radiate outward or something. Fuck if I know. But I prefer your conspiracy theory. It’s much more entertaining!

MATS has won the Champions League with Barcelona, La Liga four out of five years, Copa del Rey four out of five years. So you’re way off if you think Neuer trails way behind in experience. And MATS plays in an actually competitive league, where other clubs regularly win Champions Leagues and Europa Leagues.

Great write-up.

You’d think being exposed on the Simpsons would’ve made it harder for Dr. Rivera to achieve gainful employment.

+1 lightning truther

+1 worldwide child abuse scandal
-1 improper use of comma
+1 understandable considering horrifying implications of comment