As the fine criminologists that we all are, I believe that Dr. Reid would not be happy with us if we didn’t point out that stabbing someone 24 times is usually done by someone intimate with them. And not in self-defense.

Sometimes when I have a migraine, I wish I could have this done. I don’t know that it would actually help, of course.

Oh I can. Fuck fuck fuck all things Kardashian forever and a day.

I was raped 20 years ago. I still have nightmares. What amends can my rapist make that will make that go away? He can’t. He can’t give me back what I lost.

I have my reservations about the sex offender registry in general, but this is a great use of it. It means that during the next Senior Salute, some guy might decide pressuring a 14-year-old into sex isn’t worth spending the rest of your life on a list of rapists and pedophiles.

“Was that so hard?” = “The situation has been resolved to my satisfaction, but I’d still like to start a fight about it.”

Serious question: Why can’t the proprietor just ask the racist ass-clown to not return. “Sir, I’m sorry that our values and yours don’t match. I’m sure that another vendor would be more to your liking. Please have a nice day...” I get it—you depend on customers for your livelihood. But these people will never learn…

I have to say, BCO has spurred two important changes in the way I act in restaurants.

People are the worst, but here is a cat hugging a toy.

Perhaps I'm just an old, but with all the awful I've read about it, HOW IS UBER STILL A THING.

So, I’m happy for this woman, but frankly I’d rather Christians just stopped writing in “I give God 10%, why do you get 15%” and leaving tiny Bibles in place of tips. This is the real world, and you don’t get forgiven for being shitty to countless servers just because you were really really nice to one.

I’m confused.

ACtually thinking about the mechanics behind kissing is so so gross. I can’t believe we all just run around sticking our tongues into other people’s mouths (and crotches). And then complain when someone double dips in the salsa bowl.

Yes: I was wrong to share my honest feelings. Not, my honest feelings were wrong.

You know what doesn’t pill and isn’t see through when I bend over? My $25 Champion leggings from Target.

Yup. He regrets it because it negatively impacted him, not because he feels any actual remorse or realization.

Inspired by the Rachel Dolezal Method of non-answers.

I think when I was younger (high school especially) shaving was all about not getting picked on or teased. I have awful memories of that happening to me and a few friends when we first started growing hair. I had to go home to my mom, crying that I wanted to shave. She just looked at me and was like "you're 13, you…