I assumed he just realized Tom Brady was invincible from being tackled because of some magic water he drank before the game and gave up.

The timing makes sense. They realized they needed to hurry up and fine him because Eli was about to play in a nationally televised game, and if they waited until after it would have been like fining him for stating the obvious.

I’m just going to go out on a limb and presuppose that if you have $80,ooo in CASH just sitting there in a backpack, you are probably into some shit that goes way beyond throwing things off a balcony and causing emotional distress.

My main takeaway was that I can switch up the process all I want, but will still never create something as singularly awesome as Gritty. It was a little soul-crushing when I realized that, as well, but I’m here for you.

Right, I guess the point is there is never going to be a dynasty in the salary cap era if what the Blackhawks did doesn’t qualify.

What’s a dynasty if the Blackhawks were a mini-dynasty?

I noticed last night during the Ravens-Steelers game that right before Baltimore went for it on 4th down, they actually displayed the win probabilities on the screen for if they converted, if they failed, and if they decided to punt instead. All of it overwhelmingly backed up the decision to go for it, and the…

Waiting for this comment to get 31 stars, then I’ll know all the NFL owners read and comment on Deadspin.

Go outside?

So James is saying that Bell should get an award (one year accrued towards free agency) just for participating??

Yeah, so? I’m an actuary, but I’m still free to make my own choices. And there is no fucking way I’m ever quantifying insurance risk for that asshat Ben Roethlisberger...

He was thinking because she has sex for a living, and he’s a big-shot quarterback, he should be able to use her like a box of tissues, and what is she going to say anyway, no?

Looks like the fine people of the NFL have decided not to hog all the brain damage, and to share some with us, the viewers.

The price isn’t labeled, and when you look it up and tell the person that it’s expensive, they don’t want it any more? Cool story.

There’s a lot of blame going around for the Steelers’ poor start, but so far I haven’t seen too many people point their fingers at the most logical culprit: Antonio Brown and James Conner’s awful just-lost-a-fight-with-a-weed-whacker haircuts.

They still have a limit on the number of songs you can add to your library, right? That’s one of the reasons I switched to Apple Music. And one it seems like it would be really easy for them to address.

I’m not a lawyer, so take this with a grain of salt, but as I understand it you wouldn’t be committing any crime in this scenario assuming you are only using that track for personal consumption.

Connor did fine, but maybe having the best RB in the league allows you to make one extra play to break a tie?

When you and the people around you are constantly waving around that stupid yellow towel, it can tend to block your view of what’s actually taking place on the field.

/Tries to remember Mark Sanchez winning a playoff game