How is no one talking about the carol?! WHAT ABOUT THE CAROL, Y’ALL?

You motivated me, and apparently also The Guardian, to do the same:

PREACH. Maybe this crisis is just the excuse I need to order a Caesar, extra everything, hold the lettuce.

I know, right?! Caesar is the only salad I love, mostly because the romaine serves as a delivery system for all the truly good stuff. I was on my way to get one yesterday when I saw this news. It’s like the universe won’t let me be great.

I rage and despair every. single. day. but I actually just started weeping at my desk.

Gods, I love that movie. 

Chief of the Watch, float the buoy! 

Hahahaha, THIS. ALL. DAY. LONG.

rots of ruck

“No Cop Left Behind”

GURL, I didn’t see San Jose initially and was about to fly my ass to LA.

Totally, it’s like how clapping is weird:

Counterpoint: grape is the only edible jelly.

Thank you so much for this, I’m obsessed with her brilliance.

See?! Nicole Kidman is a floppity jillionaire and even she can’t prevent fucking tarantulas from being inside her house in (presumably) the deathscape that is Australia. Fuck right off with that noise, mate.

I’m about to change all your games, blow all your minds, and rock all your worlds (assuming anyone sees this because I am eternally fucking grey):

True story: I bought these in black and EVERYONE thought they were cute. But I have wide ET feet and they were just a bit too tight on me.

WSS is the greatest musical of all time, full stop. I’ve loved it for as long as I can remember, well before I kicked total ass as Rosalia (who in the stage version duets on “America” with Anita, NOT Bernardo!) when I was 17. (I got my first weave to play her!) If they fuck this up I will go carnival freak crazy.

“yeah, asshole, I’m a fucking lay-DEE.”