Hi! I just got my final alterations done on my dress, and that reminded me of this conversation I had with you about how we have the same dress, and I wanted to let you know that I ended up going with a loose half-slip and had the seamstress sew some support into the cups, and it seems to be working out fine. I…

This is exactly how I dance, plus enthusiastic pelvic thrusts, minus being basically a supermodel.

I believe...I can soar.

GAAAHHHHHHH NOOOOOOOOO

That’s probably true!

I mean, it’s really easy to get wrong, I get it, but...not in a review you’re writing for publication!

I never put veggies on my grocery list because I always go to the veggie section and choose what I want based on my gut. So there are things that need replenishing irregularly, or that I need for a recipe, and those go on the list - but veggies are just purchased based on my heart and my memory of the fridge.

Can I be *that person* and remind everyone that the Immaculate Conception actually refers to Mary being born without sin, and if Pip/Purity was conceived during anal sex, that is technically a Virgin Birth (of sorts)?

I used to smoke a lot of weed, and I fucking loved working out while high.

Oh yay, what a fun game!

Oh man, the best spin class I ever went to used all classical music. I’m generally a pop/hip-hop spinner, so I was really surprised at how into it I got. My main memory was when, about 3/4 of the way in - so when you’re exhausted and worn down but the end isn’t quite in sight yet - they played “Flight of the…

But also...what would you do with aborted fetus organs besides legal medical research? Surely they aren’t viable to give to actual, living babies. Even if you were able to salvage, like, a fetal heart on the black market...what’s your plan? Just hang onto it? Make some jewellery? WHAT DO PEOPLE THINK IS HAPPENING?

OK, real talk: are their parents not properly mocking them about this shit?

1. Thank you for your insightful comments. I enjoyed reading them but have little to contribute to the conversation myself, which brings me to what I actually wanted to say...

GAAAHHH my cat brought me a baby bird this morning and now I remember it.

Well instead what I did was glare with the eyes of a person who was hungover and who ALSO gets motion sick on buses. Scary yet impotent, is how I would describe that glare.

Uggghhhh one time I was on the bus and may have been slightly hung over and just barely holding it together, and a group of teenagers (like, college-aged) started singing Disney songs.

My 13-year-old cousin cried real tears because her mom wouldn’t get her tickets to go to a Vine star concert...for TWO HUNDRED DOLLARS a ticket. TWO ZERO ZERO.

I thought we millenials (and here I mean me) pay for the more expensive tiny stuff (i.e., moderately priced makeup) because we are so far away from affording actual expensive stuff (i.e., a house, a car, a savings account) that an extra $20 here and there seems sort of irrelevant.

Oh God. I’m getting married in 20-30 days (I can’t check more closely than that because I have some work deadlines before it that are stressing me out), and I can already tell not having an itinerary would be a nightmare. I’m not going to be rounding everybody up on the day telling them it’s time for dinner, or…