Or about the insidious perfidy and the ineffable mystery that is Woman.

I mean it is easy to see why. Men are taught from young age to never care or think about woman perspective- her feelings, pain, poverty doesn’t count. Men being rejected in nice way in high school once is much worse in their eyes then woman who was raped few times in her life or beaten up when she had audacity to say…

Pffft. Books about ladies can’t be harrowing tales of what war does to a man. To his very soul.

There’s someone in my supposedly liberal, progressive community who went to prison for “porn” featuring adolescent girls. To this day people here defend him and even claim that he was victimized because it wasn’t “real” kiddie porn. Meaning some of the girls had breasts and looked like they could have been of age.…

Violence is seldom the answer.

And that’s what I’m asking for advise on: how to keep my strength, keep his in check, and stay in touch with my own boundaries and needs and signals.

I know, right? I don’t get the tone of these articles on Jezebel lately. They aren’t any different from any other source, but shouldn’t they be? Shouldn’t there be some sort of nod to feminism in the way these stories are reported? Is it me?

Karyn, you are a professional writer.

ladders are terrible

The trope of the angry feminist is an imposition by those who do not want the system to change. Not taking any shit is admired when men do it, but when women do it, we’re unacceptably angry.

That option rests on the thinnest tissue of social change. It can be taken away in a very short time, and there are many in national leadership who would love to turn back the clock, given the power to do so. The gains by the feminist movement are fragile.

Some of us can handle it though. I get angry furious outraged and I still donate, volunteer, discuss the issues (I even do research about it), I still celebrate other women’s achievements (I still cheer for my former math teacher and donating to her organization that keeps on sending girls to the math olympics). My…

I think it has a lot to do with how very powerful and pervasive the “angry feminist” meme has become. It creates a polarizing effect (and I think that can destructive). People feel compelled to claim that they’re not “angry feminists” because they’ll be discounted otherwise, and because it’s an insulting and limiting…

No one enjoys being judged, so I understand why you would complain about that. What I don't understand is why people like you also seem to want to hear that what you do is a feminist act because you're doing it by choice and not just because you have to. It's cool that you get to do what you want but you can't get…

This. I’m an angry feminist. But I think our generation of women is straight-up weaker. If that pisses someone off - good. Unlike the first feminists and those after, we’ve totally accepted the stereotypes about us. Most of us strive to be feminine (shave our legs, wear makeup, heels, etc etc), because we don’t want…

Exactly. The position of “I’m a feminist but not angry” is something that women are forced to learn to affect in their teens and early twenties. It’s a pre-fab feminism that mass media pushes hard. But just as you say, the victories that women made in the sixties and seventies have all been reconfigured as defeats. We…

Modern feminism certainly suffers from a distinct lack of anger. Many feminists have become complacent and lazy, have learned to sit on old laurels and placate the men by “choosing” to cooperate with patriarchy and then call that “empowerment” because it was supposedly their “choice” to do so, even though the word…

Yeah, this is always the “tone” argument. If you were just nicer, maybe we’d respect you. I bring this up whenever someone tells me to “calm down” when I’m talking about feminism, and more than not, I’m speaking at the same volume as the men do during their arguments and discussions. But the perception is that I’m…

I will never understand how feminists can *not* be angry. This anger that permeates feminism is absolutely justified, and since women are currently losing ground and gains are being unmade, I would expect the least we can do is understand why. At which point does being a second-class citizen become something we should…