The shop owner should send a bill for the decontamination efforts.

Right? What the hell is wrong with this guy? (Obviously racism is what's wrong with him, but I still like to ask.)

They are going to have to get some Victoria's Secret model, one who hasn't been born yet because the actors are always a lot younger than the people they're playing.

I unfriended nearly all my family members on FB. I'm down to my husband and two sisters-in-law.

What happened to that dislocated eye socket we heard so much about?

Christmas tree farms are a form of slavery for the poor exploited trees, which should be set free so they can frolic with the mooses in the great Northern conifer forests. No, but seriously, I am only messing. ;)

Call in the Satanists. They will remedy this situation.

I have a Festivus Pole that I could donate to this town. But would that be considered secular enough?

It was a perfectly dignified tree when it was planted in the ground, in the wild, where it belongs. #christmastreesaremurder

Not a very relevant question considering a thing doesn't have to have intentions or be animate to suck. A gun that's functioning correctly sucks. An Iggy Azalea song played note for note with perfect precision by the New York Philharmonic Orchestra still sucks. Any Squire guitar sucks. The hole in the ozone layer…

A thing doesn't need to have intentions to suck. Many a sucky car I owned in my youth, for example.

Those crazy bigits.

tbh, that's really low on my list of priorities. First because it's already Ok for women in our society to lack ambition. Second because I've never really seen feminists in real life take issue with SAHMs, even if that is one of the more popular myths about feminism. In fact, I've read quite a few feminist scholars…

Ugh. So frustrating.

You and your future husband better included both your bosses in this conversation. Because as soon as you become a mother, you're employer is going to view you as less competent, less raise-worthy. While being a father actually helps men to appear more competent. And once the wage gap really sets in, it's going to be…

It's already Ok for women to lack ambition. In fact, it's a plus. What we need to do is make it Ok for men to lack career ambition.

I should add that the jobs my grandparents did (solid working class jobs) are no longer looked on as "respectable." And that has a lot to do with the kinds of wages these jobs pay now and also a lot to do with the fact that it is convenient for the upper classes to have an easily-exploited underclass.

I definitely felt exploited as a maid and not just because my pay was shit.

There was that story a few years ago where an adult posed as a high schooler. He had the school convinced he was Stephen Spelberg's nephew.

Yeah. Plus, those Steubenville footballers acted on their own. There was no adult pulling the strings there.